Footsteps
by kayura sanada
Summary: Heero's found Duo's old journal in a safehouse that they had needed to abandon during the war. Will it help Heero to see just how much Duo's worth? Or will it be too late? 1x2
1. The First Step

This story is going to have a lot of angst and a lot of sap, differing as times go on. This story is based on something Heero finds in a safehouse after the war, and what happens afterwards. There is MAJOR YAOI in this (male/male relationships) and this is mainly a 1x2 fic. There will, as stated before, be angst, sap, and general problems that crop up as my muses wish. 

**Warning** - YAOI, 1x2, maybe 3x4, maybe 5xS. There will probably be some sort of physical pain later, along with angst. Right now, there is a bit of sap. Ai, my sap muse, was tired of me ignoring her. Here you go, Ai!

**Disclaimer** - Gundam Wing is not mine. Bandai or Sunrise or whomever owns it. Not me. Never me. I only own my muses and my own little journal, which may have snippets taken out for this story. The snippets from songs I use in this are also not mine, and belong to assorted artists. I am not a songwriter. What I know about writing songs you could flash in Neon in bold 36 print on the rim of a dime. Please do not sue me.

And, again, there is YAOI. Turn back now if you don't want to read. You shouldn't be here!

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**Footsteps**

**Chapter 1**

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Voices tellin' me that I should get some sleep, because tomorrow might be good for somethin'

Heero wasn't exactly in the mood to go around and grab anything that had been left over in the safehouses, but he wouldn't argue. This, too, was necessary to get peace underway. Just another step. Quatre had dispatched all of the gundam pilots out to clean up the safehouses and grab everything that had been left there. So far, Heero had gone to three in the past two days, and had found nothing but an old sock. He could easily guess whom it belonged to.

In honesty, he hadn't seen the braided baka since Marimaia had come through. That had been five months, 23 days, and - he checked his watch - 6.28 hours ago. He shook his head and came upon the first bedroom.

Heero had always claimed the first bedroom, wanting to be the first in attack position if enemies came in pursuit. He never left anything behind. But, the other occupant of the room, unless on a completely separate mission, always seemed to be him... Duo. The guy with the most loose jaw in the universe. The one who would constantly nag and talk and whine and complain and... and always not care about how many times Heero tried to scare him off. He didn't listen to Heero's orders. He was the only one. If Heero told Duo to shut up, his voice would rise to a crescendo. If Heero told Duo to leave him alone, he'd start poking Heero until he finally swiveled around and Duo could talk to the his face.

Heero let himself smile. Duo had shown him all sorts of things. He had made the war somehow bearable. He had made Relena bearable.

He was also a huge slob.

So, Heero cautiously opened the door and stepped silently inside. There were two small beds and a tiny dresser on the far side of the room. The walls were white and the carpet an ugly tan that did nothing to soften the floor's surface. He went over to the dresser that he remembered sharing with Duo and opened the drawer. He never used the thing, but sometimes Duo would place meaningless objects inside.

And, sure enough, there was a black shirt in the second drawer. He picked it up, feeling the smooth texture, smelling the scent of Duo that still lingered. Duo kept saying that Heero wasn't at all human, but whenever the long-haired boy had come close, he had always felt like it. All of him did.

And he reacted now. It was a churning need that almost made him groan. He buried his head into the shirt and breathed deep, allowing himself the luxury that he had never thought to take during the war. Duo. He found himself needing the baka with every day he spent away from him.

His gaze was drawn back to the drawer then, and he gasped despite his training. There was a small diary lying in the drawer, right below where Duo's jacket had been. Why had Duo left it there?

Then he remembered what had made them leave the place. It was one of the times when having the front bedroom had been a good strategic decision. Enemies had barged into the safehouse, and he'd been the first to open fire upon them. They had barely escaped, but they had received minor injuries.

They'd left without packing.

His hand moved of its own accord to pick up the small book. It was definitely some sort of journal. On the front, a single word had been written in Duo's slurred handwriting.

Footsteps'.

He flipped it over, but the other side was clear of words. He scanned it, seeing dates at the top and snippets of sentences.

OZ isn't going easy...'

If only I had...'

The thing was only about halfway full. Heero, dead curious, opened it to the first page. It simply stated that the journal belonged to one Duo Maxwell. He turned the page again, telling himself not to read it. His eyes moved just the same.

A.C. 195, March 6'

This was wrong. He was invading Duo's personal privacy. These were things that Duo had never dared tell anyone, that were his soul's words.

But maybe it would help him understand the beautiful pilot...

He decided to worry about morals after he read the thing and sat down on the floor to begin.

A.C. 195, March 6

I've finally headed out on Deathscythe. You should feel it. The freedom of space, the comfort of the gundam... the power that comes with this strength. I feel like I could do anything. Like I could go out and destroy OZ in one mighty swoop.

But that's impossible. Right now I need to focus on my first mission. I fear to write it down. That would be more than a little reckless.'

Heero silently agreed, then took a double take when he realized that the foolhardy pilot that he'd stayed with wasn't the idiot that Heero'd thought he was. There had been at least a modicum of intelligence behind that ridiculous grin.

Professor G said that I need to focus on staying alive and meeting the mission objectives. No offense to the prof, but I know I need to focus on the damn mission. I just don't see the need to worry about my worthless hide in the process.

Yeah, yeah, I know, I know, happy, bubbly Duo can't possibly be depressed. He can't possibly be feeling anything but goofy happiness, because doesn't he always smile with that dumb expression on his face?'

Heero snapped the diary shut then, unable to read more. What Duo had just written summed up what he'd constantly thought of the pilot. The main reason, other than the war, that he had never pursued any type of alliance with the man. He had thought the guy foolhardy and oblivious to the war, mission, and world in general. Because Duo had ignored proper procedures and had always seemed so damned jovial and light-hearted, Heero had immediately assumed that, like Doctor J had said, he was like the average civilian, innocent to the war and unaware of the devastation clouding the colonies.

How wrong had he been?

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**A/N:** Yes, sap. Ai is very happy now. She may continue to be happy, as this is mainly her fic. But don't worry, those who enjoy angst, Kanashii would be happy to take over sometimes.

I would really really really appreciate it if you e-mailed me about my writing at I would love it. Ai would love it. Kanashii would love it as much as she's capable of loving. And it would feed our inspirations. I have two muses, though, and it takes a lot to keep them sated! HINT HINT Thanx!


	2. Six Feet Under the Sand

Hi!!! Yes, I know these come out kinda short, but. . . they come out fast, too, which is the main idea. I want to get these out pretty quick, because I know how important that would be for me, to at least be able to get online and scream, "YES!!! They have another shapter out!" Plus, it keeps me motivated to write more. Reviews also help immensely **Hint, Hint** Anyway, let's get on with this sucker!!!  
  
*Warning* - YAOI, though only in thoughts and entries for now. This is 1x2 and I don't even know if I'm gonna put in any other gundam pilots, let alone secondary couples. If you want me to get them altogether, then say so in a review (Psst! that's another hint!!) There is angst, subtley expressed *thoughts* (ahem) and cursing. A lot of cursing. Including the terrifying "F" word. Kiddies beware. For anyone left, have fun!  
  
Disclaimer - Gundam Wing and its characters are not mine. Nor or they Ai's or Kanashii's. We're just playing with the poor guys' MINDS. And it's very, very fun. ^_^  
  
Anyway, this is dedicated to Daphne ( ) for being the first to review to this story. Thank you so much!!! Thanx to all of you! You make me want to keep writing!  
  
He had quickly finished checking the rest of the safe house, glad that there was nothin else to find. He had then caught a plane and found himself unable to sit still, which would normally be no problem at all. He found himself thinking of Duo, and couldn't stop the upswelling of tense, bitter emotion. He'd been a fool for leaving Duo. He was going to rectify that mistake. Now.  
  
His hands reached for the journal without his knowledge, and he found himself holding it in his lap. Dare he open it again? Dare he venture into the boy's mind once more?  
  
But the unexplainable urge to know about the real teenager and not just the baka he pretended to be tugged at him horribly. He'd been wrong in his calculations, and that just didn't happen with the Perfect Soldier. How had Duo managed to fake it so well?  
  
He found himself opening the journal to find a specific date - April 29. The day the two of them had met. The day he'd been shot by Duo. The day he had tried to shoot him back.  
  
And he found it. It was underlined a dozen times and started out saying, `Holy God, Journal.' Heero found himself reading it without another thought. `I feel like such an ass. I met this guy today, this man who had a gun pointed to a girl. He has dark blue eyes and wild brown hair and a body that. . . my GOD. Or at least I wish he were mine. . .  
  
`I shouldn't have left him. I shouldn't have. I shot him, too. The first time I felt remourse for dong it. My heart aches just thinking about him. His green tank top and black, spandex shorts don't hide much, either.'  
  
Heero found himself blushing from the comment. Apparently, all those insults Duo made about his fashion style didn't really bother him. That made him blush even harder.  
  
Then he realised just what that meant.  
  
Duo *liked* him. Or at least thought he was cute. His heart raced uncontrollably at the thought.  
  
`I'm gonna dream of him tonight,' Duo continued. `All I can see is his hard blue gaze as he turned to me, the flash of pain that ripped through that emotionless wall when I shot him. . . and his still body lying in the water. Oh, God. What if he's dead? What if he drowned? It would be *my* fault. All my fault. I don't want to lose the guy, and I don't even know his name. He'd probably want to kill me if he ever found out what I was writing.'  
  
Oh, how wrong he was. Heero couldn't think of doing that to Duo. Maybe he had before, but. . . no, he never really did. So why had he been such an ass?  
  
`That is, if he's even alive. I know I've never believed in God, or ever prayed, and I'm sure as he. . . heck not a great guy, but please, PLEASE don't let him be dead. Don't let him be dead.'  
  
Duo went on to say about how he had looked, kneeling on the ground, `actually fucking lying in his own fucking BLOOD,' and how Relens had `rushed up to save him, even after he had tried to kill her. How's that for devotion?'  
  
Heero couldn't stop for his life. The next day, Duo had written, was `helluva boring, and I haven't been able to find anything out about. . . *him*.' It went on to say other things. Heero stopped at one part. He read it slowly, then read it once more. It made his body weak and his heart to fill with leaden fear.  
  
`I want to die. If I had the courage, I would do do it this fucking minute. Every day of my life is torture. First I live my fucking childhood on the streets, then my only home gets fucking BURNED TO THE GROUND because of something *I* did. Then I'm trained for war, to kill mercilessly. Now this. I'm filled with shame and guilt. that guy. . . I serously don't know what I'd do if he died. . . because of me. Even though he's the dumbass that decided to jump onto those torpedoes and let them fly while he was ON THEM. Maybe I should've just let him kill the girl. I may not have been able to see his eyes, but at least. . . at least he'd still be. . . shit. I'll write in you later.'  
  
That was all that was in there. Heero slumped in the seat, staring at the open page. His breathing was laborous. "I have to find him," he whispered, making the woman on his left look at him for a spell before turning back to her book. But he was determined. He had a mission, and that was to find Duo and let him see that he was worth too much to die. And that he'd be more than happy to prove it.  
  
*  
  
*Sniff* Okay, yeah, that wasn't too happy, but Ai still managed to get some sap into it, though I'm not quite sure how. Anyway, PLEASE, PLEASE review this for me; it'll make me so happy and it would inspire all of us. Thank you so much!!! I love all of you!!! 


	3. Every Step It Takes

A/N: Hi!!! WOW. O_O I never thought I'd get so many reviews!!! Thank you SO MUCH!!! I can only hope this chapter will be good enough.  
  
*Warning* - There is sap, angst, and explicit content that young children should only read if they want to lose all innocence and have their minds plagued with indecent exposure. In other words, DON'T READ if this stuff scares you or disturbs you. There is also cursing, which I will ALWAYS have at least a little of in each chapter. What can I say? I'm a bad, bad girl. Bad me!  
  
Disclaimer - Gundam Wing does not belong to me. The funny woman beside Heero is mine. Heero himself is not. Leave me alone about it. *cries* I hate fanfiction for having to make me say that. . .  
  
I'm dedicating this to Starlight Soul, the first to reply to the 2nd chapter. Thank you!!! (Hint: if you want me to dedicate a chapter to you, you first have to REVIEW) ^_^o Heheh.  
  
Footsteps  
  
Chapter 3  
  
The plane was about ready to land. Heero looked down at the journal, which he hadn't dared open since the last paragraph he'd read. His eyes hooded, he looked down the aisle and for once wished he'd taken the window seat. Screw old-time battle instincts; he needed some time to just STOP thinking. Because all of his thoughts rounded straight back to Duo. . .  
  
He shook his head and sighed heavily, then caught himself and frowned. He never sighed. He never wanted the window seat. He never let himself. . .  
  
Sitting bolt upright, he tried to ignore the flashes of. . . of whatever they were, but it didn't work. He imagined his tongue entering Duo's mouth, tried to imagine the taste that would be Duo's and Duo's alone. He imagined Duo's moan, his body molding against him, flattening, melting into him. Imagined himself grinding his hard erection on Duo's and. . .  
  
Shit, he was hot. And hard. He desperately swallowed the groan that welled up in his chest. Oh, God. Duo. That fantasy was going to haunt his dreams, he just knew it. Shit. His pulse was pounding, his breaths ragged. He needed release.  
  
He got ready to go to the bathroom when the light ding sounded for an announcement. "Everyone please buckle your seats and prepare for landing. Anyone who is using the restroom facilities please evacuate immediately. We will be landing. . ."  
  
Heero did groan then, and the woman looked at him in sympathy. "Do you have to go, dear?"  
  
He locked his teeth together as he slid back into the seat. "You have no idea," he growled, and she laughed. He moved to put the seat belt on, and the friction of his jeans on his erection made him have to bite his lip to keep from moaning his release right there. Shit. This was bad.  
  
He somehow managed to get hooked, and found himself with a piece of fabric firm against himself. "Shit."  
  
She giggled again. "At least they have restrooms at the airport, close to the terminals."  
  
Heero feared he wouldn't make it. Or, perhaps, he would make it, and everyone would know what he was doing. Oh, shit. He leaned his head back, body tense. Shit, shit, shit.  
  
The journal felt with a slap onto the floor.  
  
Without even thinking, he snapped up and grabbed it, holding it close to his chest. He breathed the smell of Duo, which both excited and calmed him. He looked at the journal, keepint it away from his face, and felt it beckon to him.  
  
He opened it.  
  
What lay before him was the middle of a journal entry, a helluva long one at that. His eyes moved of their own accord. `. . . said he was dead. Oh, God. He's dead. He fucking blew himself up.' The words were scribbled down hastily, as if he wanted to write everything down quickly. As if he wanted to get it all out before it tore his system apart. `I was there. I could've stopped him. I could've done *something*. But he's dead now. Oh, God. I'll never see those eyes again, that hair, not even that obnoxious glare of his. . .' There was something more there, but it had been smudged by. . . water. Tear? Had Duo been crying? He read that piece of the passage over again, and knew when it had taken place without even searching for the date. It was a bit after he had pressed the self-destruct button. (A/N: In episode 10, because we all know that he didn't press that damn button just once, oh, no, let's make a HOBBY out of it. . .)  
  
Heero's brows drew together, and he felt his erection finally start to give him a tiny bit of breathing room. He refused to think about it much, for he knew he'd go back to the fantasy. Shit. Journal. Read the damn journal, Yuy, he told himself firmly.  
  
`I don't know what to do. I'm stuck here with Quatre, playing hide-and-seek with OZ. I want to fight, for him, whether it's suicide or not. He took every singly mission. He gave the ultimate finger to OZ. And what had I done? Watched. I just fucking sat there. Oh, God. Heero. Heero, Heero. I can't believe you're gone. You were invincible. Untouchable. You didn't have to do that. Why did you do this to me, Heero?! How could you?!'  
  
*  
  
Heero stepped off of the plane, numb. He hadn't seen anything wrong with his actions when he had done them, but now it had seemed fairly rash. But, he knew, he would do it again. But he had no clue of how it would hurt Duo.  
  
Shit. He hadn't been thinking about Duo. He'd just followed the mission. He'd done as he was ordered. Was he just a machine? How could he love Duo, if he only paid attention to the mission?  
  
He shook his head and headed for the bathroom. It would be expected, after all. The woman would -   
  
He realised he was thinking in war-time thought, and forced himself to stop. He would go to the bathroom, then rent a car. He didn't know how to love Duo. All he knew was that he DID love Duo. They could go from there. Yes. One step at a time. He counted the steps to the bathroom, taking his new resolve a bit too seriously, but refusing to change it. He'd count every step he made if it would get him to Duo.  
  
( I was gonna stop here, but I'm in a fairly good mood. So, on we go!!!)  
  
*  
  
He sat within the car and glared at the stoplight. Damn these things anyway. So what if they stopped accidents. They also constantly stopped HIM. And that just pissed him off.  
  
The thing changed to green, and he nodded. Damn straight. Nothing survives under my gaze.  
  
Except that Duo had. Duo had seemed oblivious to it. That had been the first thing he noticed about the guy, other than the braid. He'd dared to call it ponytail once and had been answered with a gun to his throat before even *he* could register it. That had made him think twice about both the word and the man.  
  
Heero glanced at the place below his seat for a second, knowing that the journal was under there. He hadn't read it. He didn't want to. He was afraid that he would open up to that page again and see the proof of Duo's vulnerability. The signs that made him feel like he should be hog tied and roasted on a stick. For he had caused that pain. And that in turn brought him to his knees.  
  
"I'm sorry, Duo," he whispered, turning into a fast food resteraunt to pass a light without actually having to go UNDER it. "I'm so sorry." He didn't know what else to say, even to himself. He couldn't say that he wouldn't do it again if given the chance, because he would. What he had done had made the colonies hesitate, if only for a little while. And he couldn't say that he hadn't meant to, because that was just absurd. He rolled his shoulders uneasily. And he had no clue of what he was going to say when he met his braided crush.  
  
He wasn't ready.  
  
A strange panic went through him, and he picked up the speed a bit. If he was afraid, he'd just have to face the fear.  
  
He was going straight to Duo.  
  
*  
  
A/N: Hullo. Not much more in there, but I don't want to give out everything at once. That would mean that Kanashii doesn't get to torture all of you, and that would make her unhappy. Heheh. Don't hurt me! *Runs off*  
  
Kanashii: Hello. Don't you just love me? *Smirks*  
  
Ai: Please tell me what you think of this story. I'm really enjoying writing to all of you, and your reviews are truly an inspiration.  
  
Kanashii: Yeah, Kayura would probably like them too. She checks like ten times every day, and more on the weekends. She's obsessed.  
  
Ai: Thank you so much for your time. Excuse us, we must look for Kayura.  
  
Kanashii: Yeah, yeah, Personally, I wouldn't mind her being lost forever.  
  
Kayura: *From a far distance* Hey! Excuse you! Oh, please review everyone, it would make me SO happy, you have no idea! 


	4. I've Walked a Thousand Miles

Hello, everyone! I am SO SORRY that it took so long to get this bitch out. I'm not really in a great mood, which makes Kanashii have more control, but I tried to rein her in a bit. Terll me if this goes too fast, okay? I'm worried that I had it go far too fast.  
  
The reason for the delay is my computer. DAMN COMPUTER!!! It freezes on me whenever I try to go onto the Internet, so I'm gonna keep trying to get on here until I can get this baby sent. I don't know how long that's going to take, but I hope not long. I have a three-day weekend, and I want to spend it writing. Again, I am SO SORRY. Thank you for your patience.  
  
*Warning* - There are hints at a couple of dirty thoughts, along with angst and cursing. Cursing? Me?! Never! (Yeah, right.)  
  
Disclaimer - The G-boys are not mine, though I curse the heavens every day for that reason. (Not really, because God would come down and kill me just to shut me up.) Besides, if I really owned it, Relena would have died a slow, painful, bloody, humiliating death, like being eaten by head lice. Thank you.  
  
Footsteps  
  
Chapter 4  
  
"Stand your ground, Yuy," he told himself, looking up from Quatre's directions to the house in front of him. He could see it clearly even though it was night.  
  
He was in there. He didn't need the car in the driveway to know that he was in there. He could feel it in his gut. Heero surveyed the structure. It seemed to be one-story, and from the looks of it, the living room was in the front. It was a rancher, with hardly any yard and. . . a dog. It was the cutest creature he had ever seen. It was a golden retriever, and looked about 1 or 2 in age. It looked at him and seemed to smile. It was suspiciously silent.  
  
Heero again looked out at the house. He had thought that Duo was working with Hilde in a salvage yard on L2, but he had come back to earth after a fight with said woman. Quatre hadn't given him the details, and he felt it wasn't in his right to ask. It was Duo's business, and Duo should be the one to tell him.  
  
He took a step closer to the door, then another. Three, four. . . he stopped counting with a jolt as the dog began barking up a storm. It strained on its leash and yapped for all it was worth. Obviously, Duo had taught the thing to only bark if someone came onto their territory.  
  
And then the door opened, and Heero's breath froze. Duo had come out with only jeans on, his hair still up in that ever-present braid. It slid over his shoulder and loose strands curled around his breast, with was finely toned and hard as a rock. His nipples were erect in the cold night air, and his hair shone in the moonlight. His violet eyes caught on the figure of him standing there and froze.  
  
Heero fell entranced by those eyes. He had always tried to NOT look into them during the war; they were just so beautiful and rapturing. He couldn't stop himself. Any part of himself.  
  
It came as no surprise when he felt the force of his needs.  
  
Duo kept staring at him for a long time before saying only, "Heero." When Heero nodded, he again stopped and stared. Heero was dying to know what Duo was thinking. He was shocked, that was for certain. Was it a good shock, or a bad one? Heero took a step forward, and the dog began barking again. A light came on from the neighbor's house.  
  
"H-Hero, shut up."  
  
The dog quieted immediately.  
  
Heero looked at the dog now in a different light. Duo had named it Hero. Or was it Heero? Was it named after him?  
  
He took another cautious step forward, but Duo's dog didn't utter another sound. He trained his eyes on the frozen Duo and made his way to the porch. From there he gazed into Duo's eyes, which were in turn locked on his. "Duo, I-"  
  
"Heero," he said, and his eyes were now both sad and guarded. "I don't want to fight anymore. Take whatever suicide mission you're on now and shove it."  
  
Heero visibly flinched. Yes, it was true. Heero would sometimes go to Duo and ask for help with Preventer's missions, usually ones that either had a helluva lot of hacking or. . . or one that needed him as a hooker. Duo had taken the hooker one just two weeks after the war ended, which was three days after the end of a hacking mission. He had run off to Hilde then. Heero hadn't seen him since.  
  
"I'm sorry I made you do that, Duo."  
  
Duo's eyes widened then, and Heero could read the emotions. Disbelief, acceptance, and. . . and a strange sort of hope.  
  
"But it had been necessary for the peace."  
  
Where the fuck had THAT come from?! Shit! He saw Duo's eyes show a sting, a sort of undeniable hurt, and then were blank. Heero had never seen them that way before. In no time at all, though, they showed that stupid grin and his mouth quirked sideways. "Yeah, it would've been hilarious seeing you trying to shoot someone with some clingy lingerie, though, Hee-chan."  
  
Duo always said that name to aggravate him, but it did just the opposite, which is why Duo thought it never worked. Heero couldn't help but think of it as some sort of endearment, and he loved it.  
  
And the thought of Duo in clingy lingerie was enough to have his mind reeling. Which id why Heero refused to look at Duo that one mission. Seeing him in hooker's clothes for even a nanosecond would have fueled his dreams for a millennium, and his not-too-wild imagination was already painting in some very vivid pictures, thanks so much.  
  
Duo cleared his throat, and Heero realized that he'd been silent since Duo made that sarcastic comment.  
  
"Look, Duo," he sighed, "we need to talk."  
  
Duo's eyes widened a hair's breath. "A-About what?"  
  
Heero focused his attention on reading the boy's eyes, and saw a sense of fear and foreboding within them. That confused him. Was it something he said? He tried again. "About. . . things." He looked around. "I don't want to discuss it out here."  
  
That somehow worried the braided teen more. "Discuss what, Heero? Gimme something vague," he added when Heero gave him a pointed look.  
  
"You."  
  
Heero could see the boy's skin crawl, and wondered over it. Then, "did you speak with Quatre?"  
  
Heero nodded. "How else would I get your address?"  
  
"Hack," Duo said immediately, making Heero frown.  
  
"I wouldn't hack into your private files."  
  
Duo barked a sharp laugh at that. "Not even if I were a threat to the whole Earth Sphere?"  
  
"No," Heero said, surprising himself. He was amazed enough that he had said it, but stunned even more with the fact that he meant it. It was a daunting concept.  
  
Duo gazed deeply into his eyes then, and Heero saw him flounder. "So, you wanted to talk to me before you hooked up with Quatre?"  
  
Heero nodded.  
  
"About what?" Then he caught himself and grinned. "Sorry." Then his grin disappeared again. "Was it just to apologize?"  
  
"No." Heero realized that he was being short with Duo and sighed. "But I also wanted to do that."  
  
"Uh-huh." Duo peered at him again. "Is it important?"  
  
"Yes," he answered immediately. "I can't wait any longer."  
  
"Oh?" Duo leaned against the porch railing, quirking an eyebrow at Heero. What a sight he made, him leaning provocatively on the bars as his muscles rippled over a smooth expanse of slightly tanned skin. Heero found himself staring and looked away, feeling a familiar discomfort. "And what might that be?"  
  
What might what be?  
  
Heero mentally hit himself. He was acting like a rookie on the battle field. Shit, he was a rookie on this particular ground. Was he really ready for this? Oh, hell. He looked around, seeing that the light from the neighbor's was off. That didn't mean that they were asleep, but it was more possible than if they still had that godforsaken light on. He turned back to Duo. "I don't know how to say this."  
  
That seemed to snap Duo out of his cocky reverie. He straightened from his spot on the railing and stared down at him. "Heero?"  
  
He again sighed agitatedly, running a hand through his unruly bangs. "I. . . I don't want to leave you." He shot a quick glance at Duo's flabbergasted face before continuing. "I didn't know what to think of you during the war. You were always goofing off or smiling or generally being anything but the warrior that Doctor J always described to me. I couldn't understand how you had become a gundam pilot. I thought you were weak and helpless. And so I was rude to you. I'm sorry." He blew out a breath, but continued before Duo could say anything. "I ignored you and yelled at you and teased you mercilessly. And then, after the war, I realized that I couldn't stand NOT having you talking as I worked, or joking around as I ate, or picking intellectual fights with me. I. . . I missed you. I don't want to be away from you."  
  
Duo made a small squeak, but Heero stopped him from speaking again. He had to get it all out now, dammit. Or he wouldn't ever be able to. "Then I saw you again during that Marimaia incident and. . . I was so. . . calm. Peaceful." He blew out another breath. "I was happy. And then I was left alone again." He shuddered in remembered pain. "I don't want to go through that again, Duo. I don't think I can." For the first time since he started, he made himself really look at Duo. He was stock still and looked like he'd been frozen in place. He didn't even seem to be breathing. Then a look passed over his face that made Heero want to cry.  
  
*  
  
A/N: Not one of my best endings, but I wanted to try to get this out. Did it work?! It better have. Anyway, if you are able to read this, please review. I could use all the help I could get against this little bitch. *Smacks computer* Thanx!!! 


	5. The Pothole

Hiya! This is really short, but I wanted to stop it there. ^_^o Okay. Yeah. Anyway, here's the chapter!  
  
*Warning* - There is cursing in this. I can't find anything else, except maybe some angst. Maybe. There you go.  
  
Disclaimer - The gundam pilots aren't mine. They are from Gundam Wing, which also is not mine. Hero, though, is. I love that dog.  
  
This is dedicated to Deena, who was a HUGE piece of inspiration for me. She e-mailed me AND reviewed! You're the bomb, Dee!!!  
  
Footsteps  
  
Chapter 5  
  
Duo's eyes glistened with tears. "You what?"  
  
Heero couldn't remember having seen the boy cry before, but he knew, just like he knew he himself probably had, that he just hadn't been there to see it.  
  
`Yeah, yeah, I know, I know, happy, bubbly Duo can't possibly be depressed. He can't possibly be feeling anything but goofy happiness, because doesn't he always smile with that dumb espression on his face?'  
  
Heero mentally shook his head and stared at the again silent ex-pilot. Shit. What had he said? Something about not wanting to be alone anymore. Oh, well. Just make say something, Yuy.  
  
"Duo," he said slowly, "I don't want to have to keep going on without you. It. . . it's not as. . . peaceful. . . as I thought it would be."  
  
Duo smirked. "You thought it would be great to have some peace and quiet, to be able to hack at your computer for hours on end and not have anyone bothering you."  
  
"Yes," he replied honestly, and was devastated by the amount of hurt that flashed across Duo's face. "But I was wrong," he continued swiftly. "Shit. I'm not doing this right, but I don't know how else to say it, Duo. I need to be with you. I. . ." he almost said that he knew Duo wanted him, too, but that would've been a careless tactical error that could take away his victory.  
  
He shook his head. He'd almost made a MISTAKE. Duo was not something one could either win or lose. But he was something that you could either keep close to you or let drift away. He'd let Duo drift away from him for far too long.  
  
"You what, Heero?" Duo said quietly.  
  
Heero looked into his sparkling violet orbs and tried a smile. "I want to be with you, Duo," he said honestly. "I don't know why it took me so long to figure it out."  
  
Something flashed within those wide violet eyes, but it flashed by too quickly for him to decipher it. "Why are you saying these things?" Ahd the tears finally fell. "Do you think it's funny?"  
  
That was such a 180 that Heero was left floundering. "What?"  
  
"Do you think that this is some sort of game? Who the hell told you? I don't think Quatre would have, and no one else knows. Not that I know of. Who the hell told you that I tried to kill myself because I was devastated that you hated me so much?!"  
  
*  
  
A/N: Horribly short, I know. But, thanks to Dee (and, of course, anyone else who decides to review and/or e-mail me), another chapter is coming up super-quick! You're all great! I didn't think this story would be so loved, so thank you, everyone! Getting these reviews makes me feel absolutely WONDERFUL!!! Not to mention very excited to continue. . . *Winks*. . . yes, that was another HINT. ^___^o 


	6. One More Step

Okay, I'm finally back. Thanks for all the super reviews, you guys really keep me going! I love getting all this stuff from you, and it really does help. So don't hesitate to drop a line whenever! I'd be thrilled! (And if I'm taking too long, don't feel so bad you don't jump down my throat. I have a lot of stories up that I'm working on (damn muses won't let me rest) so I might get lost and forget.) Yes, I know I just put a parentheses in another parentheses. Bite me.  
  
*Warning* - There is sap, a bit of content, and a bit of angst. The dog is nonexistent in this, but he shows up eventually. ^_^o Poor thing. . .  
  
Disclaimer - The gundam boys are in no way mine, and are owned by Sunrise or somebody else. Don't sue me! I own nothing. . .  
  
Footsteps  
  
Chapter 6  
  
Heero stood in shock. What? That was all he could think. . . . What?  
  
He stood stock still for so long he felt his muscles cramp. He shook his head, but couldn't stop the pounding in his ears or the incessant hum of his madly beating heart. Duo had. . . what? He looked at the man he loved and saw a strange dawning in his eyes. Duo seemed to have realized that Heero really hadn't known.  
  
"Oh, God," Heero heard, but couldn't be sure that he hadn't said it.  
  
Then he was up the stairs, holding Duo in a fierce embrace, tightening his hold when Duo would have wriggled away. He burrowed his face into the boy's shoulder, though he had to bend over a bit to achieve it. The scent of Duo's cologne had his mind go blank for a moment before he remembered just what he had heard. "You what?" he choked, and it sounded so helpless and feeble that he abruptly stood and backed away. Duo faltered a bit, showing that he'd been ready to lean into Heero. Heero winced when he realized it must've seemed like he hadn't wanted the contact. "Duo, are you serious? Did you really try to. . . ?" He remembered that one thing he'd read in Duo's journal.  
  
`If I had the courage, I would do it right now. . .'  
  
Heero shuddered as the memory shifted in his mind. A chill raced through him that had nothing to do with the slow breeze that flowed around them both. Oh, hell. Duo. . .  
  
Duo had, however, decided to clam up. It seemed he believed that he'd already said more than enough.  
  
"Why?" And then Heero remembered that he'd already been told why. Because of him. Because Duo had thought that he hated him. It was his fault.  
  
Something heavy and painful lodged itself into his heart. His fault. Duo had. . . had done only God knows what to himself because he had shoved him away. Because he had failed to understand him.  
  
Oh, God.  
  
He realized he was breathing heavily and took a great effort to control himself. He looked again into Duo's eyes. "I think we should talk inside."  
  
Duo looked at him once, then again, before nodding tersely and opening the screen door, of which he held open for Heero. Heero quickly walked through it before Duo could change his mind, then turned to face him. After Duo had locked the door, Heero grabbed his shoulders and turned him so that they faced one another. He searched the boy's eyes for one more second before crushing their mouths together.  
  
Duo opened his in surprise, and Heero didn't wait to be asked. He slid his tongue inside Duo's wet mouth and tasted him for the first time. He was masculine in every way Heero wasn't. Not pushy, but still confident. Not stoic, but still holding that quiet aura of strength. Not cocky genius, but funny intellectual. They were the opposites that attracted. They were the proverbial one plus one equals one thing.  
  
They were perfect.  
  
He didn't know who groaned, but suddenly Duo's head slid back, allowing Heero deeper access, and he groaned in satisfaction. The sweet taste of Duo was bringing Heero's senses to a head. He found that their bodies were stuck together like two pieces of velcro. He felt Duo's nipples under his shirt, felt Duo's hard erection on his thighs. He moved across Duo, lining their erections together until they were grinding into each other.  
  
They both groaned then.  
  
Heero couldn't think. His head was heady with thoughts of Duo under him, on the sheets, looking up at him with those amethyst eyes as he took them up higher and higher. . .  
  
He stopped abruptly, coming back to nibble on Duo's lips when a pathetic whimper rose out of the braided boy's mouth. He groaned and grabbed Duo around the waist, holding the boy upright when he would have fallen from weak knees. They stayed that way for a while, panting and gasping and unable to uncross their eyes. "Does that seem like. . . I don't LIKE you?"  
  
Shit. Perhaps it hadn't been smart to do that. But that mouth had been begging for a kiss since Duo had stepped onto the porch and Heero hadn't been able to get that broad chest out of his mind and then. . . Duo had said that and. . . his control had snapped.  
  
Duo mewed something unintelligible and Heero smiled. "I don't hate you," he whispered into the other's ear, and delighted in the shiver that ran through Duo at the words' caress. "And I won't leave you again. Not even if you order me to."  
  
Duo shook his head. "No," he managed, "I don't want you to. . ."  
  
Relief flooded through him, and he didn't allow Duo to change his mind. If he had said that because he was still partly drugged on Heero's kiss, Heero wasn't about to argue. "Discuss it more in the morning?"  
  
Duo `uhmmed' a response and lightly sagged against Heero more. Heero knew he was falling asleep, and let him fall under, watching with a small smile. His crystal eyes drooped, then finally closed, and his breathing evened out. Heero lovingly picked him up and brought him into the bedroom at the end of the hall. He slowly opened the door and took a quick look around. The walls were painted an eerie blue that unnerved him a bit, until he realized that the color was the same as his eyes. The comprehension made him smile as he laid Duo down on the soft, black sheets and covered him with them. He stepped back and looked around again, seeing a picture of Deathscythe on a wooden bureau on the far side of the room. Beside it was a picture of the gundam pilots from back during the war, in a newspaper clipping detailing what they looked like to citizens.  
  
His mind now haunted, wondering just why Duo had kept that, he crept out of the room and walked back down the hall. He'd be sleeping on the couch tonight. He thought about Duo's face when he'd come up for air just moments ago and barely managed to stifle the groan. It was going to be a long night.  
  
*  
  
A/N: Hi! Okay, that was also dedicated to Dee, who is probably going to be e-mailed quite often. ^_^o Anyway, I'd like to thank anyone who has read this, and would like to thank in ABUNDANCE anyone who reviews. Thank you! Thank you thank you thank you. . .  
  
Kanashii: *Rolls her eyes* I wish I had more of a part in this.  
  
Ai: I'm glad you aren't. You would've killed Duo off in that suicide thing and had Heero weeping when he found out that he was too late.  
  
Kanashii: A ruined waste of a good almost-deathfic!!! Gah!  
  
Ai: Please support my idea of keeping them both ALIVE by reviewing!!! 


	7. Don't Let Me Trip

Kayura: Thank you, everyone, for being so patient with me. This is awesome, getting so many reviews, and I just don't know how to say thank you well enough.  
  
Kanashii: Nor does she know when to stop when she's said it enough.  
  
Kayura: Shut up. I'd love to say thank you to each and every one of you, but I'm eager to get to the story. So, thank you, everyone! You're all the best! And Starlight Soul, you have no idea how happy I am with all the goods. SUGAR RUSH!!! Hahahahahahah!!! Expect many, many chapters with that stuff as my reward. ^_______^ *Eats pixie stix* Mmmmmmmm. . .  
  
*Warning* - YAOI. Dunno what that is? LEAVE. There's also sap in this, with a little angst near the end. Uhmm, anything else? I don't even know if there's any cursing. O_O WOW!!! . . . Okay, wait. Yeah, there's cursing. Whew!!!  
  
Disclaimer - The gundam guys aren't mine, and neither are their gundams, which are long roasted at this point. ^_^o Anyway, I don't have anything to lose, so it wouldn't be in your interest to sue me, unless you thrive on wasting both of our time and money. . . and I don't have enough of that to waste. Thanks!!!  
  
Footsteps  
  
Chapter 7  
  
And indeed it was. Heero found himself tossing and turning, unable to get comfortable. He groaned, then tried to muffle it, thinking of Duo upstairs.  
  
He snorted. What else would he be thinking about? It certainly wasn't the discomfort of sleeping on the couch; he'd slept in much more austere locations, described as disgusting as best and fucking-horrendously-like-a-sewer at worst. Hell, he thought wryly, he *had* slept in a sewer once.  
  
And since that brought up memories best left buried, he pushed it out of his mind.  
  
He got up again, silently going out side for a minute. He had forgotten about Hero, he set about to barking immediately. Heero winced and put a finger to his lips, but it did nothing to calm the animal. Heero had wanted only one thing: the journal. He marched over to the dog and grabbed its muzzle shut. "If you wake up Duo, omae o koroso," he snarled, and shoved the dog away. He knew he was being mean to the poor animal, but it had the dog's mouth trapped better than duct tape. It didn't even whimper.  
  
Satisfied, he walked over to the car and unlocked it, digging under the driver's seat. He left the light on to read a bit out here. Hell if he was gonna be caught with the thing. Talk about not getting off to a good start.  
  
`May 18, A.C. 195,  
  
I'm hiding right now, avoiding OZ and generally the world at large. Hell if I'm gonna get into details. I don't have the time. I have to stay on the run.  
  
I just wanted to record a couple things really quick. One: I'm probably not going to survive this suicide mission.' Heero stopped and tried to figure out which mission this was, but couldn't, which meant that either only Quatre knew or everybody was in the dark. He continued. `This is completely insane, what I'm doing. About to go into an OZ base and get my brains blown out. And why? Hell. To get rid of files the enemy has on 01.'  
  
Heero was shocked. When the *fuck* had they managed to get any information on him at all?  
  
`It seems they had taken classmates hostages and had managed to catch someone who had been really high on him. She told them every nuisance of his appearance, and then everything she knew about his attitude and past. There wasn't much on his past, thank God, but there was plenty on his personality. Apparently, he'd given a rather elaborate opening speech to the class on wars and violence, and she'd just happened to record it. So they also have his voice.  
  
`I've been tortured by these bastards, and I've seen what they can do. I won't let that happen to Heero. It was a miracle that he survived. . . that one time. . . I won't let him get hurt again, not if I could help it. I don't want to feel that pain again. I don't want to lose him again. . .'  
  
Heero sighed and slowly shut the journal. He'd never get enough of this thing, he knew. If he could hear every single thought that had ever passed through Duo's mind, he could never get bored.  
  
And the fact that Duo had cared for him all that time, even when he'd been such an asshole and had treated him like the scum from the bottom of the sewer he remembered once sleeping in, had him shivering. Or maybe that was the cold.  
  
He decided to go the hell back into the house and. . . do something.  
  
But once he'd safely hidden the journal again and locked his car tight, he turned to stare at Duo's golden retriever and walked towards it, smiling gently. It was watching him warily and lying on the ground, face on his paws, staring up in that funny way that dogs could. He stretched out a hand for the dog to sniff, and he slowly came forward. Patient, he waited until the dog started wagging its tail before petting it.  
  
He played with it then, rolling around on the ground and forgetting that it was early morning. He wrestled with it and got pinned to the ground, where the dog promptly started licking his face, tail thumping against his thigh as it swung back and forth. He laughed and rubbed behind its ears, trying to get into a sitting position and failing miserably. He ended up trying to cover his face to stop it from smelling too much like dog breath. Hero left him for a minute, and he took the time to take a breather. He felt a small object hit his stomach and cautiously peeked out from under his arms to see a tennis ball lying on him, dog slobber getting into his shirt.  
  
So he got up and played with the dog some more.  
  
He didn't notice how long he'd been playing until he realized that the sun was all the way up. He smiled at the glory of it and bent to hug the dog as it came back to him with the messy tennis ball. The dog suddenly dropped the ball and barked loudly, its tail wagging double-time, and it turned. Heero knew without looking what was beside him, but stood anyway and turned. "Good morning, Duo."  
  
Duo looked a mess, his braid mussed up and his jeans wrinkled. His chest, though, was still wonderfully naked and his droopy violet eyes were gorgeous in the morning light. How had he gone without this for so long?  
  
Duo grunted in reply. "You both can come in," he yawned, leading the way inside, almost falling from Hero's excited barks and tumbling feet. Heero himself wasn't so far behind.  
  
Duo, it seemed, had been up just long enough to start breakfast. Bacon was on the stove and eggs were sizzling right beside them.  
  
"I though you couldn't cook?" Heero said in remembrance, and won a tired chuckle.  
  
"I can't," Duo answered honestly. "But at least my bacon and eggs are edible."  
  
Heero smiled softly and nodded; Duo turned his head and took a big whiff. A smile bloomed across his face, making Heero's heart flutter. "You can wash your face in the bathroom right there," Duo pointed, and Heero went inside, grateful. By the way he smelled, it was a wonder Duo could breathe near him without thinking him a werewolf.  
  
He came out, having also tended to his bladder, and helped Duo finish up cooking breakfast. He set the table for them and finished scrambling the eggs so that Duo could focus on draining the fat from the bacon. They walked around each other in silence, which somehow surprised Heero. Duo had always been a chatterbox when he'd been around. Why was he so quiet now?  
  
They both placed the food on the table and sat down. Heero tried to not be so shocked that Duo didn't say grace. Just because he wore a priest's outfit didn't mean he was too religious. After all, didn't he always used to wear that stupid smile?  
  
And it was then that Heero noticed that Duo was NOT smiling.  
  
"Duo?" he prompted, and gained a little sigh.  
  
"Heero. . ." he started, and looked down to study his hands. "Why did you. . . stay? Why'd you even come back?" He glanced up through his bangs. "I. . . think we need to have that talk."  
  
Heero nodded and braced himself, getting ready to say words that he didn't know how to say. Words he thought he never would say.  
  
And prayed that Duo might believe them.  
  
*  
  
A/N: Hi! I'm here to remind you all to REVIEW PLEASE and keep them coming. I love reading you guys' reviews, even the ones that just say `continue'. It's great to know that my story doesn't suck, and makes me really wanna hurry for you all!!! 


	8. Hesitancy

Okay, hi!! I'm back!!! Thank you SO MUCH for all of these great reviews. Thank you thank you thank you!!! I just have something really quick to say: if you don't like this story, I completely understand, and I'm glad that you might want to tell me your opinion. But my opinion is important as well, and, though I know that I'm certainly no genius or intellectual being, one's opinion's are to be respected, along with one's privacy. I'm sorry if you don't like that. I really am. But if you want to fight with me over it, then I suggest you find a gun quick, or else your head will be rolling and my katana would have participated in its first kill. Thank you. However, please still free to tell me your opinion, because *I* will respect them. If you don't want me to make an ass out of you, then just remember that EVERYONE'S opinions are important. Thanks again!!!  
  
All that said (and don't take offense, the-certain-person-of-whom-I'm-speaking-to, I just don't really like the way you said that stuff about my privacy and my struggles. It's just, at that point, I'd flipped you off and told you to `eat shit and die' before I read the other things in your reviews) let's continue with the stories!  
  
P.S. Aren't my copious amounts of cliffhangers a bitch? Heheheheheheh. . .  
  
P.P.S. - I would be honored, Bi Panda. ^__^ Thanks for reading!!!  
  
*Warning* - There's sap, cursing, and a little angst. We're finally seeming to get somewhere, but it's so sloooooow. . . ^_^ But I'm nice - I gave you a bit more here. Yay!!!  
  
Disclaimer - The gundam boys aren't mine, or else much more than politics and explosions would have occurred. . . and Relena would be dead. And there would be more sequels. And. . . well, it's sort of obvious they aren't mine.   
  
Footsteps  
  
Chapter 8  
  
Duo was looking at him expectantly, and he had no clue as to how to start. He looked down at the eggs, then looked to my hands. He had lost my appetite somehow, and had decided to place the fork back down without even realizing it.  
  
"Try at the beginning," Duo said quietly, and he looked at him. Heero tried a small smile, but it didn't seem to come out right. It slipped from his expression like water falling from a high cliff.  
  
"The beginning, " Heero echoed, and refused to look from Duo's violet eyes. "The beginning. Right. Hell." He rubbed his face. "I don't know how to say this, Duo."  
  
His honesty seemed to somehow make Duo relax a bit. A tiny bit. An infinitesimal bit.  
  
"Duo," he floundered, a need, a pain, sharpening through his gut. "I. . . did you really hurt yourself?"  
  
Duo's eyes guarded triple-time, but he nodded, then held out his arms. It was then he saw the pale scars that snaked up his forearms, jagged marks that were cleanly sliced, testimony to the despair he had placed into Duo's heart. His heart jackhammered roughly in his chest. How had he survived? The marks looked really, really, REALLY deep. His mouth opened, trying to say something. His hand lifted, wanting, needing to touch. To feel. His mind blanked, then raced, unable to process; he felt his face blanch and couldn't muster up the energy to care. Duo. Oh, God. Duo.  
  
Duo dropped his hands and watched him with a strange apprehension. "Duo," he breathed, and his voice shook. His hand whispered toward Duo, but he suddenly stood and picked up his plate. Heero watched him, unable to say anything. How had he missed those scars before? How had he not seen them? Oh, God. Duo. "How did you. . ."  
  
Duo shrugged nonchalantly. "Quatre showed up. You know," he said thoughtfully, "I never found out exactly WHY he had shown up right then. . . I guess Shinigami still didn't want me." He shrugged again.  
  
Heero couldn't take it. "Do you really think your life is a game?"  
  
"Isn't it?" he countered. "Whatever gods are out there sure are having fun with lil' old Duo Maxwell, aren't they?"  
  
Heero couldn't understand. "Your life isn't something for anyone to toy with," he stated plainly. "Not a God, not Shinigami, not. . . not me." He looked directly at the frozen ex-Deathscythe-pilot, staring into his eyes and letting him see the conviction in his own cobalt gaze. "I should have been honest with my feelings since. . . gods, since I got a good look at you. I think it was lust, at first. Hell, at first, I didn't know what the hell it was. But then. . . it grew. It was. . . emotion. Emotion was. . . unacceptable. And so. . . I couldn't talk about it. I couldn't accept it. And. . . and I thought that you would. . . hate me. Despise me." Heero shook his head. "No, that was a lame excuse I used to not come before you about. . . this." He looked at Duo's face, seeing only confusion and a naked fear. Not fear of him, but. . . some other fear.  
  
"Why would you think that I would. . . that I could ever hate you?"  
  
"You. . . that outfit you wore," he said, his hands trying to explain further. "And. . . your cross. I don't know that much about God, or doves, or whatever, but I do know that homosexuality is. . . unorthodox. Unreligious. I thought that. . . well, you know." Knowing how stupid that made him sound, Heero quickly said, "I thought that you would be disgusted with my. . ."  
  
Duo seemed to take pity on him. "I wore that to. . . remember."  
  
"Remember?" Heero parroted. "Remember what?"  
  
Something flashed through Duo's eyes for a moment before he could hide it. "My. . . responsibilities." Duo got to washing his food down the drain. Obviously, he, too, had lost his appetite. He absently threw his bacon on the ground. Hero, who had been lying nearby, almost tripped over himself running to snatch the food. Heero threw his down, as well. Hero looked as if in heaven.  
  
"Your. . . responsibilities?" Heero again echoed. Duo turned to him and looked at his plate pointedly. He wordlessly handed it over, and Duo took it and scraped the eggs off. The garbage disposal was the only sound louder than the water; neither Heero or Duo willing to compete for supremacy.  
  
Finally, Duo turned off the water and the disposal. The only sound now was Hero munching happily on the bacon. Both Heero and Duo watched for a moment. Then, ". . . So what made you come back?"  
  
Heero took it for the diversion it was, and accepted it. Now, perhaps, was not the time to delve into the other's past. He wanted to get this out right, but wanted to make sure he didn't let anything from the journal slip. That probably wouldn't go well. So he settled for, "I realized, after the war, that I couldn't stand to be away from you. I always complained about your voice disrupting me. . . and it was the God's honest truth. I couldn't concentrate on a damn thing when I heard your voice." He looked from Hero back to Duo, and found Duo's piercing gaze on him. "I couldn't. . . think about much of anything when you were around."  
  
"You. . . what?" Duo said, confused.  
  
"I couldn't concentrate on the damn mission. I couldn't understand it. Why couldn't I keep my mind on the mission parameters? I. . . I wanted to hate you for doing that to me," Heero confessed. "For confusing my thoughts, for giving me. . . all these different emotions and. . . and confusing the Perfect Soldier."  
  
"I *confused* you?" Duo asked, amazed. "But. . . you were never confused. You were always so damn focused I wanted to fucking *puke*."  
  
Heero shook his head. "Not around you."  
  
Duo lifted his head. "Prove it."  
  
"That time I told you to punch me," he said immediately. "I. . . I *wanted* you to knock me out. I wanted you to be the one to escape. It was stupid and reckless. I still thank whoever was watching for letting my training come in enough to have me punch you back. It would've meant. . . *everyone's* death. But I wanted you safe. Stupidly, I wanted you to be free and not endure the. . . Gods, what *did* they do to you?" Heero shook his head again. "And then there was the time I lived through falling down that cliff after you came to save me."  
  
"Say what?"  
  
"When I decided to fight to stay alive."  
  
"Uhh, Heero, not to disappoint you, but you pulled that parachute loose because Relena screamed your name." He gave me a funny look that obviously said, `are you okay?'  
  
I shook my head. "Stupidly, I thought you had called me. My mind was flitting images of you. . . when I had seen you after you shot me" - Heero saw Duo visibly flinch at that memory - "and when you had come back. . . when you had rescued me. And my mind remembered your voice. . . and then I heard someone shout my name. . . and I had thought it was you."  
  
A soft "oh" sounded out of Duo's gaping lips. He looked funny, like he was trying to imitate a fish for that Guesstures game. Heero smiled softly with that thought, and Duo seemed to snap out of his daze. "But then. . . why now? Why me?"  
  
"Why not you?" Heero parried softly. "Who the hell else?"  
  
"Relena," Duo said without hesitation, and he noticed Heero's immediate look of soft disgust.  
  
"No, thank you," Heero said simply. "She's. . . a bit too naive for me. Too innocent. I feel. . . strange around her, as if I might break her if I said the wrong thing. She just doesn't understand a warrior's world. I can't speak to her without having to edit it."  
  
Duo looked incredulous. "But. . . you spent so much time around her. You sent her a *teddy bear*."  
  
Heero winced. "I don't know *what* I was thinking. She wanted it, and I thought it would be only right to give it to her, since I had just left and joined Preventers. But she just stalked me more. I didn't want that. That was why I had stopped being her bodyguard in the first damn place." Heero took a calming breath. "But I couldn't stand being around her. And it made it hurt more. . . hearing her voice during the day and remembering yours at night."  
  
He felt himself *blush* and ducked his head, but not without seeing Duo smile softly. "Sounds that seemed like they were out of reach, and eluded you at day's light?"  
  
Heero's head snapped up, eyes wide. "Y-Yeah," he admitted. "Exactly like that."  
  
Duo looked at him oddly. "What. . . Dammit, I can't see you doing this because. . . for me. Because you wanted to. . . to see me. It's not like you!" He peered at him closely. "You ARE Heero Yuy, aren't you?"  
  
Heero gave Duo his old death glare. "What the hell do you *think*, Maxwell?" Then he smiled. "Yes, Duo, it's really me." I took a slow step forward, saw him looking at me with a vaguely dazed expression. "Maybe. . . maybe I've just changed."  
  
He snorted, and the swirling depths cleared. "Or maybe you were cloned. With a better personality."  
  
"I can't argue the fact that I was a heartless machine during the war." Heero grabbed Duo's hand before he could notice how close he had gotten. Instead of fighting like Heero had expected, Duo just looked down at their linked digits and slowly looked up at Heero. Heero saw the pain naked in his eyes, and tried to speak. Duo's anguished words cut him off.  
  
"It. . . hurts. . . it hurts too much to believe."  
  
Heero's heart wrenched in the wrong direction, tripping over itself. God, how hadn't he seen this? How had he been able to ignore it? Had he really been that heartless, that. . . stoic? Was he really just some sick, twisted, sadistic little bastard, that he would make Duo go through all this?  
  
They jerked as if they'd been shot when the doorbell rang.  
  
*  
  
A/N: There you go! Not as good a cliffhanger, but it'll hopefully keep you guessing anyway. Review? Please? You guys are like my little pieces of heaven. I'm SO happy to be getting all of your reviews. Keep them coming??  
  
Kanashii: Yeah! I might make my scene here soon. . . heheheheheh. . .  
  
Ai: This is MY story! Go away!  
  
Kanashii: What happened to that polite attitude? *smirks*  
  
Ai: Go! *turns to audience* Please review and let me know that you like the story. I really don't want Kanashii to get her hands on this. . .  
  
Kayura: You know she does that so that everyone -  
  
Kanashii: LALALALALALALALA!!! NO ONE IS LISTENING!!!  
  
Ai: *holding her ears* Please??? 


	9. Crossing The Bridge

Hiya! I'm back!!! It's not long, but I'm mean that way. I don't really have much to say, except THANK YOU FOR ALL OF YOUR WONDERFUL REVIEWS! I DON'T KNOW WHERE I WOULD BE WITHOUT YOU GUYS!!!  
  
*Warning* - WE FINALLY SEE SOME SHONEN AI AND YAOI BETWEEN THESE TWO!!! THANK GOD!!! There may or may not be cursing. I actually don't think there is. There is also some sap in this, with tiny hints of angst. The pairing is 1x2 for those who have not, for some strange, ungodly reason, been able to figure this out. ^__^ There you go. Pretty warning.  
  
Disclaimer - The gundam pilots and everything else do not belong to me. I can't really think of much of anything that belongs to me. That said, I will only laugh at you if you sue me. Then I'll kill you. Thank you!!!  
  
Footsteps  
  
Chapter 9  
  
Heero thanked the man and let him leave, carrying his suitcases into Duo's house. He looked helplessly at Duo, but saw that the boy had again closed himself off with that stupid grin of his. Heero's brow furrowed, and he dropped the suitcase down, not caring that he'd left it in the middle of the living room. He went over to Duo, who was busy looking elsewhere. Gently, he placed his thumb and finger under Duo's chin and moved it to look at him. Duo's smile faltered for a second, and he was struggling away. Heero placed a hand on Duo's bare back and smiled softly. He felt Duo's tense muscles beneath his fingers, felt them shift ever so slightly, and felt a hot feeling course through his system.  
  
"Duo," he whispered, and the boy's eyes darted down to his lips. And lingered. "I've said this before. The best way to live one's life is to act on one's emotions." He let Duo think about that before explaining, "my heart led me to you."  
  
Duo's smile vanished to be replaced by tears that Heero knew he wouldn't shed. But it seemed that he had broken through that wall that was created. Heero let go of Duo's chin to link his hand in Duo's. Then, responding to his need, he lifted their hands up and looked at the scars again. They were as long as he remembered, pale and deep and unsettling. He let go of Duo's hand to lightly trace their way up Duo's arm, feeling the sharp indent they had created on Duo's fair skin. He felt Duo shiver and slowly taced his way back down.  
  
He bent his head forward ever so slightly and whispered against Duo's neck, "remind me to thank Quatre. A lot."  
  
Duo hummed something and leaned into him, pressing his chest to Heero's. Heero stifled a groan as he felt Duo's nipples rake lightly over his shirt. But when Duo came forward and rubbed his erection over his own, the groan came out loud and deep. He threw his head back and rocked lightly, grabbing at Duo's hips. Duo returned the swaying motion, linking his arms around Heero's neck and burying his face into Heero's chest. Heero had never really realized how short the Deathscythe pilot was. He was always so stubborn and strong he had appeared twice his real height. But now he was hyper-aware, feeling Duo's lips lift up to kiss his neck, slowly making his way to the fluttering pulse there. When he touched it, Heero felt himself go weak, and he tightened his grip on Duo as another moan erupted from his chest.  
  
Hero snapped a playful bark in their direction, and Heero saw Duo's eyes slowly unfold from their glazed state. As soon as Duo gained back his senses, he shoved off of Heero like a rocket. Heero reluctantly let him go.  
  
Duo looked around, Seemingly still disoriented. He took in Hero, who had his butt up high in the air as his front paws lie on the ground. His tongue was lolling out of his mouth, and he seemed to have a big, goofy smile on his face.  
  
"Still," Duo said shakily, and the dog lie immediately on the ground, watching Duo carefully. Duo managed a weak smile for him.  
  
Heero watched all this with fascination. Usually a dog so well trained wouldn't bother with fun. It seemed Duo wouldn't allow that. The dog was everything his master was: smart, guick, and fun-loving. Heero was in awe of them both.  
  
Duo's eyes came back to him then, and showed chagrine. Heero promptly went over to him and tilted his chin up once more. "I'm sorry," he whispered. "I should've stopped myself." Duo tried to speak, but Heero knew it would be to take the blame and continued. "But I've wanted you like that, against me, for a very, very long time. I don't know if you want me the way I want you. I don't know your feelings. But I want to," he added, and Duo's amethyst eyes showed something akin to hope. "If you'd like, I'll move into a hotel, and -"  
  
"No!" Duo shouted, and both of them were shocked by the outburst. Quietly, Duo said, "I don't want you to leave. I don't want this to have just been a dream."  
  
Heero's heart wrenched up to his throat, and without another word, he threw his arms around Duo. "It's not a dream," he assured, "Because it's finally become reality."  
  
He felt Duo's arms reach round him and sift through his hair, and he let his head fall to burrow into Duo's mass of chesnut locks. He smelled the scent of Duo, of some sweet herb that hadn't been discovered yet, and let himself believe what he had said.  
  
*  
  
A/N: Sorry that's so short, but I felt that that, too, was a good place to end. So. They're together. Took them long enough. But that's not the end. What are they gonna do now? How in the hell are they going to be able to handle each other??? If you wanna know, review, and I'll continue!!! Thanks!!!  
  
Ai: Thank you for your support!  
  
Kanashii: *Grumbles* 


	10. Let's Make Our Own Road

Hello, hello, hello!!! I'm SO sorry it took so long to get this out. School has momentarily taken over my life. I have the game on Tuesday to worry about too, and taekwondo on Monday. So I'm gonna try to get a lot out this weekend. This week has been full of homework and karate, which is why I haven't gotten anything out. Sorry!!!  
  
*Warning* - There is angst, sap, sexual innuendos, and maybe cursing. Maybe some quick work, and maybe a sudden change. *Shrugs* These muses are ganging on me for leaving them hanging. They've taken over my body. I don't even remember what I wrote here. Oh, well. There is a 1+2 pairing in this that really isn't that hard to see. Have you realized that yet???  
  
Disclaimer - Gundam Wing is not mine, not will it ever be. This is just for fun. I expect no money. I also expect no suing. Because I really don't think idiots that stupid exist, though of course I could always be wrong. . .  
  
Oi, koi, I hope this makes you happy!!! You'll see why at the end!!! ^_^o  
  
Footsteps  
  
Chapter 10  
  
"So. . . why are we at the grocery store again?" Heero asked, looking around at the aisles of food.  
  
"One: because I need food," Duo replied, grabbing a basket and Heero's arm and dragging them both along with him to the first aisle. It seemed to Heero that he had regained that happy composure. Heero noted that the cross was being worn now, though it hadn't been on before. Duo was also wearing black jeans and a black t-shirt that said, `People Like You Are The Reason People Like Me Are On Medication'. Heero smiled at the thought, then sobered as he realized that Duo may very well be on medication.  
  
"The other reason?" he asked curiously.  
  
"Reasons," Duo corrected, grabbing a loaf of bread and smiling cheekily at him. "Two: I needed out of the house. Three: We needed to talk, and no one would yell or complain, or even listen in at a grocery store." He looked around and said, "I have a bomb in my back pocket. I'm planning to use it on that dumbass over there with the toupee." He pointed. "Got it?" He looked at Heero. "Is anyone staring?"  
  
Heero made a quick scan of the room. "No."  
  
"Exactly," Duo stated, and moved off to the second aisle. Heero followed him, trying not to smile. Peace really must have lowered everyone's tension. Or had it always been like this in grocery stores? Heero never went to them. He had once, after the war, and half of the people were asking for his autograph. The other half tried to do his old glare. He had noted that they had needed work.  
  
"So," Duo started, looking at the cans of soup that were on sale. "How, exactly, are you managing to stay with me and not go flat broke?"  
  
Heero smiled ever so softly. "Quatre's paying for it. I. . . I told him that I wanted to see you, and he made the arrangements right away."  
  
Duo looked at him strangely. "Then. . . Quatre knows?"  
  
Heero nodded shortly.  
  
Duo placed the can in his hand back onto the rack. "Oh."  
  
Heero grabbed his shoulders and turned him. "He never told me. I never knew." Heero's grip flexed as he remembered the scars. "I never knew."  
  
Duo looked into his face, searching, probably, for signs that he was lying. "I didn't want you to know. You'd either sneer at me or. . . come running out of some stupid obligation. . . and I didn't want that."  
  
Heero looked into his eyes as well, watching the swirling depths. Watching - and falling. "I would never sneer at you," he said, "I don't know how I did before. I had closed of the feelings you'd given me until I didn't know what they were. I'm sorry for that." Heero backed away then and looked around, amazed that no one had seemed to have seen that.  
  
Duo smiled a shaky grin and stepped on down the aisle. "What's your favorite color?" he asked, and the question made Heero jump slightly. His favorite. . . color?  
  
He thought for a moment. "I'm not sure," he admitted, "I never really thought about it." He looked up, into the lights high above, and smiled softly. "I think. . . purple." He looked at Duo's stunned face and cocked his head. "You?"  
  
Duo blinked, then smiled. "Both black and blue. Blue for. . ." he blushed, then shrugged. "And black for death."  
  
Heero looked at him sharply. "Death?"  
  
He nodded, absently checking out the cans of fruit before turning into the other aisle. "Death, pain, loss, sadness. They're all personified in the color black."  
  
Heero made a mental note to ask Duo about that medication. Duo really seemed to be upset. Upset deep down, like he felt it all the time, but never bothered to show the world. Heero grimaced at the thought that it could very well be all his fault.  
  
Gods, but he wanted to remedy that.  
  
"Hey, the color isn't that bad," Duo said haughtily, and Heero focused on him again as they went through the aisle without even looking at anything. "At least, I don't think so."  
  
There was a sort of trepidation here, and Heero wanted to kill it quick. "Your opinion is as important as anyone else's. Maybe even more. I, too, can see what black personifies, but. . . I don't like the things it represents to me."  
  
There was a silence broken only by the speakers announcing that a clean-up was needed in aisle seven. Then Duo said, "can things be gay?"  
  
Heero almost tripped. He stared hard at Duo. "W-What???"  
  
Duo let loose a tiny chuckle at Heero's consternation. "You know, like when someone says `homework is gay' or something. I said that once around Wufei, and he blew up. He said that things couldn't be gay."  
  
"It is fairly hard for something inanimate to have sexual preferences," Heero said slowly, surprising a bark of a laugh from Duo.  
  
"I guess," Duo said with a smile, "but doesn't personification take care of that?"  
  
It was Heero's turn to laugh out loud, and Duo burst out a smile that seemed to split his face. It was a real smile, one of happiness and contentment. They looked at each other, and Heero felt a warm, jovial feeling spread through him until his knees were weak.  
  
"Duo?"  
  
"Um-humm?" Duo asked, looking back at the rack, a goofy smile on his face. "Hey, Heero, do you like chips, or -"  
  
Heero turned him again to look at him, and the violet orbs sparked with something, something like caution and kin to hope, that again made Heero want to fall to the ground in a heap of gooey sap. "Maybe. . . maybe we should go back to the house."  
  
Duo looked at him oddly, then seemed to understand. There was a wariness, then cautious understanding, until finally joy radiated from him, and he hugged Heero around the waist, burrowing into his chest. "Do you mean it?" he whispered, though Heero was sure that he could feel the pounding of his heart, hear his labored breathing. But, most of all, he was certain everyone could see the obvious bulge in his pants.  
  
"Gods, yes," he said, and was shocked to hear the growl that rippled through his chest. "And I'll do it right here if you don't get off now."  
  
Duo jumped away, but threw a sly smile at him. "You think I would argue?"  
  
In answer, Heero grabbed Duo's basket and updumped it onto the rack. Some people turned to stare, but he looked to them and said only, "we have an appointment." That seemed to be enough for them, and he grabbed Duo's wrist and marched them the hell out of the store.  
  
"Damn kids! I can't believe he did that!"  
  
He flipped the fat woman off and opened the door to the sound of "clean-up in aisle four."  
  
There would be a clean-up, all right, Heero thought as Duo started the car, both of them trying very, very hard to ignore something that could make them crash. "Duo," he ventured, "do you want this?"  
  
"I've been wanting it since I saw what I shot," Duo gritted out, and sped out of the parking lot.  
  
"Good," Heero stated. "Because I don't think I can wait any more."  
  
Duo turned to look at him and smiled, one that lit his eyes and set Heero's heart to meltingly warm. Heero could do no less than smile back.  
  
*  
  
A/N: I know that wasn't too long, and I'm sorry. But, as I said before, I'm gonna try to get more out later this weekend. If I get, say, 6 or 7 reviews, I'll start the next chapter. ^_^ Yes, that's a bribe. Review, please!!! 


	11. Shortcut To Sunshine

Hello!!! I'm finally back! I wanted to get this out well, if not right, so it took a bit longer than expected. Thanks for all the reviews, I think I got around double what I asked for. I'm so happy!!! You guys make this whole thing VERY worthwhile. Here's your prize!!!  
  
*Warning* - THERE IS YAOI!!! FULL-FLEDGED, IN YOUR FACE LEMON RIGHT HERE!!! If you don't like it, DON'T READ THIS CHAPTER!!! I'm very serious!!! There's sap, some cursing, and YAOI!!!!! 1x2 to the MAX!!! There. That's your only warning. SO HEED IT!!!  
  
Disclaimer - Gundam Wing is not mine. I'm just doing stuff with them that would give their creators nosebleeds. Please don't sue.  
  
Here you go, Koi!!! I hope you enjoy!!! To everyone: I hope this is good for you all. And Dragen Eyes?? I LOVED your review. Thanks for rambling like that. In all of it, you told me what you specifically liked in my story, and that really helped me out. ^_^ See you at the end!!!  
  
Footsteps  
  
Chapter 11  
  
Heero smacked open the door to Duo's house and crushed Duo to the wall, holding his arms as he plunged his tongue into the boy's sweet depths, nipping the teeth and grinding his hips to Duo's. Heero couldn't think for the noises pounding insanely in his head, beating out a fast, heart-stopping tempo that he matched with each thrust. Duo groaned into his mouth, and he shuddered as needs and wants flowed through him like rain. He released Duo's mouth and panted, closing his eyes and leaning his chin on his love's head, trying to regulate his breathing; trying to control his urges.  
  
"Duo," he rasped, "we need to get to your room fast, or I'll take you here."  
  
"I don't give a fuck where you take me," Duo spoke, his voice throaty and full of lust. "As long as it's you."  
  
Duo pushed Heero back a bit, then devoured his mouth in another kiss. Their tongues clashed, lips crushing against each other, hands moving fluidly. Heero's vision swam, his senses wired. He felt everything as Duo's hands glided down his shirt, groaned as they rubbed lightly over his taut nipples, thrusting as his fingers lowered still. He cried out when he felt them brush, like feathers, over his erection. He grabbed Duo's wrists roughly.  
  
"Gods, Duo," he moaned, grinding his hips into the boy's own, making him moan before him. "I want you in bed. I want to see your hair around you. Not on the floor. I want it to be perfect."  
  
"Heero," Duo groaned, and they fell against one another, lips teasing, tongues tormenting. When they parted, Heero forgot what they were talking about. "It's perfect if it's you."  
  
Sparks flew in him at the words, making him feel himself beat. His jeans pressed up against his penis, and he felt himself flail. "Duo," he groaned, "please. . ."  
  
Duo seemed to understand that this was important to him, and backed off a bit, letting Heero breathe and push away. Heero hissed sharply as his movements brought him into closer contact with the denim. They had to hurry.  
  
He dragged Duo up the stairs, unable to stop himself from ripping off the boy's shirt. The white letters flashed, and Heero pressed Duo against the banister, trying to ignore the searing heat in his veins. "Duo, are you really. . . I mean, the shirt. . ."  
  
"Hell, no," Duo growled, and Heero let loose his appreciation in a feral snarl, dipping his head to take one of Duo's nipples in his mouth. He'd been begging to do it since he'd seen the boy come out of the house topless. He nipped at it with his teeth, flicking the nub with his tongue, hearing Duo moan and arch his back in response.  
  
Heero's skin was fever hot, his dick throbbing with hard desire. He licked Duo's chest, right in between his breasts, and felt Duo shudder and moan. Duo grabbed his hair and brought his mouth up, binding them in a fervent kiss. Heero moaned into Duo's mouth, grabbing Duo's braid and making him bend, allowing him deeper access into his domain. Duo's heat made him sweat, made him want more. He couldn't taste enough of him, could devour him and not drank his fill. He locked bodies, let go of Duo's hair to trace his way down Duo's broad chest, his waist. He dipped a finger into Duo's navel and Duo screamed. Duo's hands played with his hair, sifting through and mussing, hanging on as if for dear life.  
  
Heero managed to pull away, and Duo whimpered his protest. Heero panted and gazed into Duo's glazed eyes, seeing the lust, the desire, and other things he couldn't allow himself to name. He picked Duo up, and Duo yelped his surprise. He clung to Heero's neck and ducked his head into Heero's collarbones, seeming to be regulating his own breathing. Heero had just reached the top of the stairs when Duo flicked his down feather-light on his pulse at his neck. Heero groaned and let his head fall back, almost dropping Duo. Duo made a pleased sound in his throat and bit his neck, sucking on the pounding vein. Heero's approval rumbled in his chest.  
  
Duo placed his feet back on the ground and ripped at Heero's shirt, peeling back the garment and touching his chest. Heero's eyes closed as he sagged against the wall, feeling Duo's fingers circle his nipple, coming ever closer, but never touching. He hissed when Duo placed his tongue at the very edge of his chest, right fucking beside the nipple. Not touching. Never touching. The circles grew tighter and tighter, finally being replaced by his tongue. But they never touched.  
  
Heero grabbed Duo's head and placed it in front of his nipple, which was red and hard and aching from the torture. "Touch me," was all he said, and Duo finally, finally wet his nipple with his tongue. Heero arched his back and groaned heavily, feeling the lightning explode inside him. He could swear he heard the roaring sounds of a storm outside. Or maybe inside. Gods, who could think when this was happening?  
  
Duo reached around him and opened the bedroom door, pushing Heero in. Heero's legs hit the back of the bedpost and he fell back onto the bed. He moaned and tried to get up, wanting Duo next to him. He heard movement in front of him, and opened his eyes to see Duo stripping. He looked. . . gorgeous. He took off his boxers, leaving nothing on, and stood before Heero with the most open look of pained expectation on his face. Heero's heart fairly stopped. He looked up and down his soon-to-be lover and couldn't help the predatory gleam that came to his eye. "I want you."  
  
Duo's eyes sparked, and he tumbled down onto the bed beside him. He felt hands on his jeans buckle and groaned at the friction caused by the movements. "Duo," he sighed, lifting his hips off the bed so that the boy could take off his pants easier. When they were thrown across the room, he threw himself onto Duo, rubbing his fingernails lightly on his shoulder blades, feeling him buck, making him squirm. And what he received, he got well in return.  
  
Bodies took over as flesh met sweaty flesh, hearts pounding, pulses racing, minds blanking. Words weren't needed here. Only touch. Touch and taste and smell. Heero's hands fell to Duo's cock, and Duo's moan split the air in two. He found the thing tight and warm and hard. Very hard. Semen dripped down the head. Heero, entranced, dipped down and licked up the come.  
  
Duo screamed long and loud, fingers coming to dig into Heero's hair. He bucked and twisted, and Heero let his hands fall to cup Duo's balls lovingly, letting his thumbs run over them, hearing Duo scream with delight. His own blood was crashing through him at an ultra-high pace, but he wanted this to be perfect, so he held himself in check. He licked at Duo's cock with a small smile, letting Duo thrash and moan, hearing words fall from his mouth.  
  
"Now, now, dammit. . ."  
  
"Take me. . ."  
  
Heero opened his mouth and took Duo into his mouth; Duo's cries rose. He licked Duo's head, swirled around it mercilessly, still teasing Duo's sacs. Right when Duo was ready to come, he backed off.  
  
"Heero!" Duo cried, and Heero heard the need and sudden uncertainty in his voice.  
  
His own voice was low and cracking with desire. "Lube. Now."  
  
Duo's hand fluttered a bit, seeming to indicate the desk. Heero got off the bed and raced for it, coming back almost immediately, his head foggy enough to not wonder about why Duo had the lubrication on hand. He quickly lathered himself before he'd do something stupid - like forget - and came to straddle Duo. He wet his fingers in the lube once more and leaned over Duo, touching the head again, which was once more oozing. He cautiously dipped a finger inside, and heard Duo's cry. There was no pain in it, so he added another, stretching Duo and feeling his intense warmth. He couldn't wait to be in him. He looked up into Duo's face, which was shut tight. He stuck one more finger inside, tested a bit, and decided Duo was ready. He got on his hands and knees, looking into Duo's face. "Duo," he whispered, "look at me."  
  
Duo's eyes snapped open, and Heero looked into the violet orbs, desire mounting at the sight. Duo's legs raised, and they went onto Heero's shoulders. Heero slowly placed his tip against Duo's, feeling Duo's response, noting the absence of fear. He slowly entered his love, just an inch, then two, then he went fully into the hilt, hearing Duo crying out. He began to leave immediately, but Duo grabbed his hips and looked into his eyes. "Don't leave," he rasped, "don't end this dream."  
  
"Gods, Duo, this isn't a dream," Heero whimpered, and couldn't hold himself back any longer. His hips dug in, then out, making a pattern that Duo quickly matched. Heero's body shook as a feeling escalated slowly, like fire licking its way through him, eating him, ravaging him. His tempo sped, racing. The heat flew through him until all he could see was Duo's violet eyes, which left to white, and suddenly, it all burst. He screamed Duo's name, feeling his partner come all over his hand, only then realizing that he had been pumping Duo. His own name sounded in his ears as he collapsed bonelessly on top of his lover, breaths coming out in sharp pants and heart stretching to be released from his rib cage.  
  
Duo's arms entwined around him, and he burrowed into Duo's sweet body. He felt the come around them and dismissed it. It would be harder to clean off, but damned if it wouldn't be worth it.  
  
"Duo," he whispered.  
  
"Uhmm?"  
  
"That right there?" he said, feeling exhaustion settle on him and not caring. He was with Duo, in his arms. Nothing else mattered.  
  
"Uhmm?"  
  
"I wasn't a dream."  
  
"Nope," Duo agreed, and Heero heard his grin. "Dreams are never that -" Duo yawned and snuggled out from Heero, getting himself into a spoon position in front of him. He rested his ass on Heero's crotch, and Heero felt the embers of the fire stir within him. "Never that damned good."  
  
Heero hummed his agreement and settled down for his first ever nap in the afternoon. And damned if it would be a dream, too. Reality had become far better.  
  
*  
  
A/N: Was that any good??? It was my first ever lemon, so PLEASE be nice to me. And review??? We want these two to wake up eventually and find out that they had sex, and don't even know one another's jobs!!! o_O Yeah. Please review!!! ^__^o 


	12. Light In The Dark

I don't know when this is getting out, but I'm able to write on the computer, so I'll just type it now and get it out when I can. Thank you, everyone, for being so patient. I owe you all a lot. I can't do much but write more, so that's just what I'll do. I hope this is enough for now. I need to work on my others, as well.  
  
As for now, I'm just gonna type up as much as I can and get it all down. A belated Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to everyone! (Or Happy Hanukkah, or Kwanzaa, or whatever!) I'll just get started with the story now.  
  
Oh! And I didn't put anything other than the lemon in because, if someone wanted to skip the lemon, they didn't have to go hunting for the other stuff. And Dragen Eyes, if you're still around, go right on rambling! It's the best!!!  
  
I also realize that I said that Duo's house looked like a rancher, then in the last chapter I had the two going up the stairs to get to Duo's room. Oops. Let's just say that Heero doesn't know two things about houses, huh? That'll work, right?  
  
So sorry it took this long! Sorry, sorry, sorry!!!  
  
*Warning* - There is yaoi, 1x2. There is cursing (duh) and ... other stuff. There's spoilers from Episode Zero. There's a little talk about sex and some seriousÿsap AND angst. Pretty cool, huh? My muses are a bit pissed that I haven't been using them ...  
  
Disclaimer - The lyrics aren't mine, and neither are the gundam boys. Seriously, if they were mine, do you think I'd make them love each other and not ME??? Uh, just kidding ...  
  
Claimer - The poem IS mine, just like the storyline. And I WISH I owned the dog ...  
  
Footsteps  
  
Chapter 12  
  
*I still want you by my side, just to help me dry the tears that I've cried*  
  
  
  
Heero watched Duo wake up, a small smile flitting on his face. Duo slept soundly, a faint snore breaking the quiet of the room. Heero tried to adjust his position and felt a presence on the bottom of the bed. He looked down to see Hero lying there, sleeping, it seemed, just as silently as his master.  
  
Heero looked at him with a small frown. Where did the dog constantly come from??? He dropped the matter and turned his gaze back to Duo. His hair wisped around him, loose and free. The band holding it must have been lost sometime during the lovemaking.  
  
Heero smiled at the thought. Lovemaking. Gods, he'd wanted this. He reached over and tentatively touched Duo's cheek. The soft skin felt even more fragile against his calloused palm, and he quickly brought his hand back.  
  
Before he realized it, Duo had grabbed his hand. Heero looked into Duo's eyes, sleepy and warm. A soft smile touched Duo's lips, and he brought Heero's hand back onto his cheek.  
  
Heero's heart burst.  
  
"Duo," he breathed, afraid to speak. Afraid to stay silent. "I ..."  
  
Duo shook his head. "Shh," he said, "Please ... let's stay like this. Just ... for a little while?"  
  
Heero leaned over and gently kissed his love's forehead. "Duo, I want to stay like this with you forever."  
  
"Thank you," Duo whispered, and drifted quietly back to sleep.  
  
Heero propped up an elbow and contented himself with staring at Duo through the dawn's first light. The sun's orange rays made his hair seem on fire, and made his pale skin fairly glow. "Duo." There was no answer, and he continued. "Whatever you want, if it's in my power to give, it's yours."  
  
*  
  
"Uhmm. . . Heero?"  
  
"Yes, Duo?"  
  
"What's your job?"  
  
Heero choked on his coffee, and began to cough. Duo moved to help, but Heero waved a hand and ordered his body under control. When he had calmed, he slanted Duo a Look. "What?"  
  
Duo looked sheepish, but bulldozed ahead anyway. "Well, I kinda realized that we had ... uhmm, that we'd ... duuhh ..."  
  
Heero watched him with a strange curiosity. Why did Duo seem to have trouble putting what they'd done into words?  
  
"Uuhhh, that we'd ... y'know ... dammit Yuy, help me out here!"  
  
Heero started, then looked at Duo guiltily and made a small smile. "You mean that we made love?"  
  
Duo opened his mouth, closed it, and looked away. "Uuhhh, I was thinking had sex."  
  
That stung.  
  
"Anyway," Duo continued quickly, and Heero tried to throw his pain aside, "we did that without knowing anything about each other's lives after the war." He slanted Heero a look. "You ... DO know nothing about my life after the war, don't you?"  
  
"I am oblivious," Heero admitted sheepishly. "But I don't want to be."  
  
"You never liked being unaware of something," Duo said, almost to himself. "So what's your ... uhh ... occupation?"  
  
Heero chuckled slightly. "I work with Wufei as a Preventer."  
  
"You're a Preventer?" Duo asked, watching him with a new intensity.  
  
"Yes," he acknowledged, waiting to hear what Duo had to say.  
  
There was a pregnant pause. "Oh."  
  
"... Duo?"  
  
Duo's eyes slowly raised up from the kitchen table, wary and closed off. They quickly changed to that goofy grin and sparkling mirth that Heero could now see past. It was as if sleeping with Duo had awakened a new bond between them, and Duo could no longer hide from him. "I should've known you couldn't give up on the battles, Hee-chan."  
  
"Duo ..." Heero shook his head and didn't say anything. He remembered what the journal had said. It hurt to know that Duo found it necessary to hide behind his mask around him. But, at the same time, he understood. These emotions that had erupted within him were strong. Strong and volatile. "The battles ... aren't everything. I want to protect the peace that we've had to fight for. That's why I stayed with Relena. I wanted to protect her because she symbolized the peace. It was taken ... the wrong way. Apparently by everyone."  
  
Duo regarded Heero for a bit more before getting up and picking up the coffee pot. He filled up his glass and looked pointedly at Heero. He shook his head, and Duo placed the pot back down. "I don't understand you."  
  
Heero watched him.  
  
Duo sighed his defeat. "You try to kill me. You try to kill yourself. You stick around Relena like you're two pieces of velcro. You ... you come to me, wanting to be with me. You fight desperately for peace and harmony; you give up your gundam and head off to no man's land after that thing with Maremeia." Duo looked at Heero with eyes that glittered strangely. "You risk your life a thousand times ... and when its over, when it's not necessary to fight anymore ... you go back to that damn battlefield. *Why*?"  
  
"I have to, Duo. I am a soldier."  
  
"Not anymore!" Duo slammed his coffee down on the counter beside him. The dark liquid splashed upon his hand, wisps of smoke whirling lightly in the air above the accident.  
  
"Duo!" Heero yelped. He bolted up from his seat.  
  
"Stay back, Heero!" Duo warned, and Heero saw his hands tremble slightly. "You *were* a soldier. The time of wars and fighting is over. The gundams, the mobile suits, they're all gone!"  
  
"But, though wars have ended, battles have only just begun," Heero explained quietly. "Every day, there's someone trying to take away this peace. I fight for it. Like I always have. Like I always will. Duo, it's who I am."  
  
"But *why* is it a part of you? I've had enough worrying!" Duo gave a small squeak, seemingly horrified of what he'd said.  
  
It dawned on Heero. "You're afraid I'll die."  
  
"Well," he defended himself, "aren't you the one who constantly blew himself up? Aren't you the one always taking the worst missions? The one making the simplest missions a damn suicide assignment?! Yes, Heero Yuy, you are. That's all you ever seemed to do." Duo turned his head away, looking at his injured hand. "And ... when you went after that last piece of Libra ... and when you blew yourself up ... and ... gods, then there was the time you -"  
  
"Duo ..." Heero stood and walked over to Duo, wrapping his arms around him and lying his head on Duo's. "I can't say that I wouldn't do it again if I had the chance to go back." He felt Duo stiffen, but still held on. "All I can do is say that I'm sorry. But my only thought was peace. I'm a warrior, first and foremost. That's how I was brought up."  
  
"But ... *why*?" Duo buried his face into Heero's chest, breathing deeply. Heero hugged him tighter.  
  
"I don't know, Duo." Heero shifted slightly, bringing their bodies into full contact. "But that's who I am. Ever since I was a kid, I was brought up to be an assassin."  
  
Duo pulled back and looked up at him. "Since you were a ..."  
  
Heero smiled down at him. "Come on," he said gently. "Let's get that hand cleaned up." He led Duo to the sink and turned the water on.  
  
"Hee-Heero, I ... when I was a kid, I -"  
  
"No," Heero whispered, "tell me when you're ready. Only then." His eyes lit up as he turned the water to hot. "You haven't told me your job."  
  
"OW!" Duo tried to pull his hand back, but Heero held onto it. "What're you trying to do, burn the whole damn thing?!"  
  
"Calm down, Duo," Heero chuckled. "It'll hurt now, but it works better this way."  
  
"IT HURTS!" Duo screeched, again trying to wrench his hand free.  
  
Heero leaned his head down to Duo's ear. "Trust me."  
  
Duo stopped struggling, but he held himself as stiff as a board. Heero quickly lathered some soap onto Duo's wound, washed it off, and turned off the water. "There. See?"  
  
Duo looked down at his hand, then at Heero. "I don't feel it anymore." He looked back down.  
  
"I know you don't." Heero dried off his hands on a nearby dishcloth. "Here." Duo hardly managed to look up from his arm in time to catch the towel. "Well?"  
  
"Well, what?" Duo remarked, blotting his own hand with the cloth.  
  
"What's your job?"  
  
Duo raised his eyes to his brows, head still lowered. He quickly looked back down. "I ... don't really have a job."  
  
Heero's eyes widened. "... You ..."  
  
"I've done stuff. I've managed. This house was already paid off ... it's one of Quatre's, of course, but ..." He saw Heero's concerned gaze and looked quickly away. "It's not that I don't have a job ... I just don't have a real job." Heero's face puckered in confusion. "No, I have a job ... sort of ... it's not really a job, though ..."  
  
"Duo ... please, just say it." Heero felt something odd working in his chest. His heart pounded so hard it hurt. Something squeezed in him, leaving him gasping for breath. He didn't have a job and Heero hadn't known to help. Why didn't he ask for it? Stubborn little-  
  
"Well ... it's just ..." Duo groaned. "*Why* did I bring up this subject?!"  
  
"It would have come up eventually," Heero pointed out. Duo slanted a quick look at him, a question in his violet eyes. Heero couldn't make out exactly what it was before he looked away again.  
  
"I ... I write. Mostly poems. That kind of stuff."  
  
Duo had Heero's rapt attention. "You're ... a poet?"  
  
Duo winced. "Yeah."  
  
"Like what?" Heero asked.  
  
Duo cocked an eyebrow. "What?"  
  
"Say one," Heero said. "Please?"  
  
Duo groaned. "Not that look."  
  
Heero looked at him oddly. "What look?"  
  
His groan only rose. "You don't know you're doing it?!"  
  
"Doing what?"  
  
"Why me?!" Duo buried his head in his hands. "Wheelhumm hoo hihurl."  
  
Heero blinked. "What???"  
  
Duo's hands slid slowly down his face, hanging for a millisecond before dropping like stones to his sides. "Welcome to my world/ Where shadows hide the light/ And darkness overwhelms you/ And you don't know what to fight."  
  
Heero heard it, heard the rhythm. His heart beat anguishly. In the words, in the voice ... there was so much pain in them both.  
  
"Say hello to the darkness/ Say good morning to despair/ Sacrosanctity is forgotten/ In the depths of my lair."  
  
"Duo ..." Heero murmured, wanting him to stop now. But Duo seemed to be lost in his words.  
  
"So whisper to the shadows/ Of all that I've done wrong/ They already know my secrets/ This is where I belong."  
  
"No!" Heero cried, and crushed Duo against him once more. Duo looked startled for a moment. "Stop, please. You've done nothing wrong. I can't think of anyone who's done anything more *right*."  
  
"You're wrong," Duo said softly, so softly Heero could hardly hear it. "You don't know ... you can't possibly know what I've done ..."  
  
"Duo ..."  
  
Duo's eyes gazed at nothing. He seemed to be lost. "Sister Helen ... Father Maxwell ... I killed them ... It was me ... I caused the Maxwell Church Tragedy ... it's all my fault ..."  
  
Heero recognized the name of the Maxwell Church Tragedy. He had always wondered if Duo had been a part of that organization. "How could you have? You were only a child."  
  
"It was me, Heero. I killed them all. No one sees that. Quatre's doctors couldn't help me. They all asked me why I was upset. I couldn't tell them. They've never been there. They've never seen it. They didn't -"  
  
"Duo! Snap out of it! Please!" Heero shook Duo slightly, starting to feel panicked.  
  
Duo shook his head. "I'm just so tired of the roller coaster, Heero," he whimpered, grabbing Heero's shirt tight in his fingers. "I want off. I just want off it. I hate this ..."  
  
Heero grabbed Duo's lax body carefully. "It's going to be okay, Duo," he reassured his now sleeping lover. "I'll help you, I swear."  
  
*  
  
Hero whined at the front door, and Heero let him in. He bounded inside and yipped his happiness. Heero went back to the kitchen and sat down, his coffee mug sitting forgotten in front of him. He had placed Duo on his bed, sheetless because the sheets that were on last night were being cleaned thoroughly ... by the washing machine. Definitely not by him.  
  
Hero placed his front paws on Heero's lap. Heero looked down and tried a smile for the animal. Hero rested his head on his paws and looked up with that way only dogs could. "Not falling for it, huh?" Heero asked quietly, and turned to look at his mug. His gaze rose to Duo's mug on the other side of the table. "Me neither." His head dropped into his hands. "When Duo told me ... it didn't really hit me how devastated a person would be for them to be willing to ..." He couldn't finish that train of thought.  
  
Hero whined in pity.  
  
Heero looked down at him and laughed a bit. "You know more about this guy than I do. Help me out, eh?"  
  
Hero paused for a moment, then leaped up and barked. Heero cocked his head. "What?" The dog barked again, and Heero stood. It ran off into the living room, then turned and barked once more.  
  
"Okay, okay, I'm coming!" Heero laughed and followed the dog, who led him up the steps and into Duo's room. Heero's chuckling stopped cold.  
  
Duo was thrashing on the bed, making little mewing noises. His body looked slick with sweat. Heero hurriedly stepped forward. "D-Duo?"  
  
Duo stilled and opened his eyes. Had he really awakened that easily?  
  
Heero quickly ran a visual scan on Duo and noted that there were no injuries. He felt a tightening in him loosen. "I'm glad you're safe."  
  
"Sister!"  
  
Heero started in surprise. His voice was like a child's. He checked Duo's eyes one more time and did a double take. His eyes were dilated and -  
  
"I-I'll go get a doctor!"  
  
`Duo, what're you dreaming about?' Heero wondered, coming up to the edge of the bed. `Is it something from your past? It looks so ... painful ...'  
  
"W-Was it my fault?! Because I stole the mobile suit from the Alliance?"  
  
"Duo ..." Heero kneeled down beside the bed. "Please ... wake up?" `Let me help you ... let me be here for you now ...'  
  
"That's not noble! That's just DUMB!" Duo's fists pounded upon the bed. "What's the point if he's dead now?!"  
  
"Dead?" Fear made Heero grab Duo's shoulders. The panic inside him could not be squelched. "Duo, wake up! Wake up! Whatever happened, it's in the past! Please, don't torment yourself over it now! I know it may hurt, but you've got to let it go! Whoever died, don't remember them dead!" A little girl flashed before Heero's eyes, a smile on her face. His heart wrenched in remembered pain. "Duo, it'll be okay. I'm right here!"  
  
Duo slumped a bit in the bed, and his eyelashes fluttered. He turned his head. "H-Heero?" He struggled to get up, but Heero didn't give him the chance. Instead, he was caught underneath Heero's crushing embrace. "What -"  
  
"Shh," Heero murmured. "Just let me hold you for a moment."  
  
"Heero ..." Duo's arms curled around Heero's body. They stayed like that for what seemed like hours, just holding one another. Making sure the other was real.  
  
*  
  
A/N: Uhmm, I know that wasn't too long, but that was a good place to end. There you go! I'm back! If anyone's left, please review! I'm really sorry for the long wait. I hate computers. Damn, blasted things. Oh! Has anyone seen Pirates of the Caribbean? I love that movie!!! ... Anyway, please review, and once again, I'm really sorry!!! 


	13. Not Alone

OMG I am so sorry!!! I have no good excuse! School just came and knocked me unconscious. Gomen! I'm just gonna shut up so you can get to the story!  
  
*Warning* - There is YAOI in this. 1x2. No lie. Really. Truuuuuly. There is also cursing, angst, a little sap, and some other inconsequential crap. I have big words and Japanese stuff in here. I was just in that mood, I guess. For those of you who don't know, omae o korosu means `I'll kill you' and hitori ja nai means `you're not alone'. There you go.  
  
Disclaimer - The G-Boys are not mine. *Cries and runs away in shame*  
  
Footsteps  
  
Chapter 13  
  
Heero's heart still hammered in his chest, making him feel like it would burst free from its cage. He felt Duo shivering beneath him, and he knew that his lover was trying to fight back the tears and the screaming. Heero had had those nightmares.  
  
/Are you lost?/  
  
His grip was bone-crushing, but Duo's was just as harsh. They both needed grounding; they needed to know that they were alive and that there was someone with them. Heero was there for Duo and he was willing to die to prove that Duo wasn't alone. Not anymore. The scars of loneliness were still fresh, probably in both of their memories. Heero refused to give Duo the chance to hurt himself again.  
  
Duo's trembling finally slowed a bit, and Heero tried to loosen his grip. Duo kept him still, his body begging him to continue the embrace. Heero found himself completely unable to resist.  
  
"I'm so sorry," Duo whispered into Heero's chest. "I didn't want you to see my Hell."  
  
Heero could only shake his head. "I'm here for you, Duo. I'm not leaving you alone to your nightmares anymore." He lifted his head to smile reassuringly at his lover. He looked Duo over. He was wearing the usual shirt and jeans. But ...  
  
He gently fingered Duo's chest. "You look ... almost naked without your necklace on. During the war, I never saw you without it."  
  
Duo cursed suddenly and flung himself up from the bed. Heero watched him in a bastard mix of disappointment and amusement. "Shit. When I heard you that night, I raced out without putting it on. And what with being shocked to hell and back, I forgot all about it ..." Duo rambled a bit more as he struggled to stand against legs that refused to cooperate.  
  
Heero, concerned, stood and scooped Duo up. He was much too light, he again noted. Duo needed some food in his stomach.  
  
"Heero, what the fuck do you think you're doing?! Put me down!"  
  
"No." He turned back to the bed.  
  
"Dammit, Yuy, if you don't put me down right now -"  
  
Heero dropped Duo onto the bed.  
  
There was a squeak from the braided boy, then the moaning of springs trying to take in Duo's slight weight. "Yuy, you're going to feel SO much pain once I'm done with you!"  
  
Heero merely laughed. "Where's your necklace, koi?" he asked, then stopped. Koi??? Where had that come from?  
  
Duo blinked in confusion. "Koi? Is that like baka?? What is baka, anyway? Probably big, ugly, drooling idiot." He continued rambling even as he pointed to a small chest on the far bureau. Heero went to it, still listening to Duo. "And I don't appreciate all those things you said to me. I found out what `omae o korosu' means. That's really rude. Was I the only one you ever said that to?" Duo didn't give Heero time to answer. "And what was with the monosyllabic answers?? Was your vocabulary not up to snuff, or something? A man who knew everything about a computer like you should know more words than `no' and `shut up' and all them. And what the hell was up with that `hn' thing you always gave me? It was -"  
  
"Got it." Heero turned to Duo again. "You don't need to be nervous, Duo. I'm not going to demand explanations for what occurred. You should know me better than that. I don't pry."  
  
"Hell, most the time you don't even know," Duo grumbled.  
  
"I always know." He came up to the bed and moved in front of Duo, who was sitting Indian-style. He straddled Duo's legs, practically sitting in the boy's lap. "Here." He bent forward, pushing away loose strands of chestnut hair to snap on the necklace. He held the cross in the palm of his hand for a moment before letting it drop onto Duo's black shirt. This one had writing on it as well. It said, `I'm sorry. My fault. I forgot you were an idiot.'  
  
Duo looked up at Heero and smiled shakily. "Th-Thanks, Heero." He moved under Heero slightly, and he was graced with the firm pressure of Duo's erection against his own.  
  
Heero groaned and leaned his head on Duo's, breathing deep.  
  
"Holy shit."  
  
Duo smirked at him. "What?" He cocked his head to the side and chuckled lightly. "Are you surprised? You shouldn't be."  
  
"It's the middle of the day," he argued feebly.  
  
Duo just laughed, wrapping his arms around Heero's waist. "So?"  
  
And that sounded so nice, with his mind fuzzing dangerously and his ears ringing, that Heero hummed an agreement and gently pushed Duo onto his back. "Duo," he murmured, "I think we should wait ... our occupations are only the beginning of the list of things we should ..."  
  
Duo smiled lightly. "Heero, if you can stand me not having a real job, I might be able to survive you having one that will take you away from me."  
  
He meant it jokingly, and Heero could see that he didn't really mean it. *Give me more now,* he seemed to be saying. *Before your gone and there's nothing left but ash.*  
  
"I'm not leaving you," he said fiercely, and he took Duo's mouth within his own. "I'm not going to leave you alone, koi. I'll stay by your side forever." He felt Duo's heavy breathing against his lips, and he kissed Duo until they were left gasping for breath. His hands slid to Duo's arms, thumbing lightly the scars that marred their surface. "I just need you to stay with me, too."  
  
"Yes," Duo breathed, arching his back beneath Heero. Heero's skilled hands slid up Duo's shirt, and he felt Duo stiffen beneath him.  
  
"Koi," he whispered, "Hitori ja nai."  
  
Duo hummed something unintelligible and reached up to bring Heero's head down for another blood-boiling kiss.  
  
Suddenly, Heero was shoved into Duo, crushing the boy. Above him came a bark, then a series of unmistakable pants.  
  
"Hero!" Duo yelped, "get the hell off!"  
  
The dog merely bent down to lick Heero's neck, and the boy laughed in surprise and happiness. He turned, causing Hero to fall off the bed. It immediately brought its paws back on the bed, and Heero rubbed its head. Hero's tongue lolled out in doggie bliss.  
  
Heero heard a disgusted sound from where Duo was perched. "You two are impossible."  
  
Heero turned to him, a retort on the tip of his tongue, and froze. There was a kind, gentle expression on Duo's face that showed Heero how much the braided boy cared for him. He felt a smile tug his face. "Just ... what does that mean?" He heard the breathy, husky voice and was partly surprised that it came from his own lips.  
  
Duo's smile was radiant. "Did you know that that's the first time I ever heard you laugh like that? It wasn't crazed or infinitesimal. It was ... nice."  
  
Heero had to think about it. "I didn't find many things funny back during the war."  
  
"No shit?"  
  
Heero's smile widened a bit as he continued petting Hero. "And just when did you learn the word infinitesimal?"  
  
Duo mocked indignance. "I, sir," he said, waving a hand dramatically to his chest, "am a very intellectual and brilliant poet."  
  
"Yes," Heero nodded, "you are."  
  
Duo stared at him for a moment, having not expected that at all. "What?"  
  
Heero just shook his head and stood. "Come on, get up. I'll fix some food."  
  
Duo looked at the digital clock on the nightstand by the bed. "Um, Heero, it's, like, 2:00 in the frieking morning."  
  
"How about that?" Heero agreed amicably, watching Hero for any sudden moves. Hell if he was going to be thrown to the ground by a dog. "It won't be anything beautiful. A chef I am not."  
  
"Trust me, I remember."  
  
He turned to stick his tongue out at Duo, which, he assured himself, was completely justified, when the doorbell rang.  
  
"Who the fuck?" Duo spoke, voicing Heero's exact thoughts. His mind was on alert, and he wished he had a gun. Duo seemed to be a bit tense, too, to Heero's odd relief. But he still went to answer the door. Heero followed on his heels, ready to spring into an attack if it was necessary.  
  
Duo walked through the house, looking at the living room light that betrayed them with its luminescence. He then turned and twisted the doorknob.  
  
*  
  
A/N: I know, I know, stupid place to end it, but I wanted to get this out before another day went by. There you go!!! I noticed that I didn't get as many reviews as before, which is to be expected, but it still kind of depresses me. So if you just said `hi' or `OMG you're alive' I would be sooo happy!! Thanks to those who reviewed last chapter!!! Take care!!! 


	14. Walking in the Rain

It's finally me again! I finally got the time to do this, but I'll have make-up work to do later. *shrugs* Oh, well. I'll deal with that then. For now, here's the next chapter!  
  
*Warning* - mild cursing, 1+2, some angst, and, I dunno, some other stuff, maybe. Not much, but you'll get a helluva lot of angst in later chapters.  
  
Disclaimer - I don't own the Gundam Wing characters, I just mess around with their brains. I'm actually gonna try to decrease my dislike for Relena, and yet am still eternally grateful that I do not own her. Thank you.  
  
Footsteps  
  
Chapter 14  
  
Quatre's eyes blinked up at them, his smile blossoming as he saw Heero behind Duo. Heero relaxed as he saw the easily recognizable blonde as the one at the door. His eyes took in the silk shirt and trousers he wore, noting that the boy didn't really want to wear the garments. It was evident by the way he fidgeted in the outfit.  
  
"Hi, Duo!" Quatre beamed, as chipper as always. "I wanted to come see you before I had to go meet some businessmen. I'm sorry it's so late ..." He checked his fancy Rolex. "It's almost 8:00." His open face puckered into a frown that showed his frustration. "I've got to leave sooner than I thought."  
  
Duo's brows furrowed. "What?" He raced upstairs, leaving Heero alone with Quatre. Heero watched him leave, wondering what had caused Duo's hasty retreat.  
  
"I'm glad you two finally got together," he said, smiling sweetly in his subtly expensive attire. Heero shifted his gaze back to his friend. He found that he could easily call the other gundam pilots friends, and was glad that that part of humanity still lived in him, despite his training. "I actually came out here for a conference nearby. I told you about it."  
  
Heero nodded silently, remembering Quatre saying something to that effect when he'd asked for Duo's whereabouts. He'd been too busy thinking about Duo and that little diary to really pay attention.  
  
"So, I decided to drop by." Heero started, having been so lost in his thoughts that he'd momentarily forgotten about Quatre. It was amazing how he had managed to revert to a fairly normal person so quickly. He supposed it could be the loss of the need for war, or maybe the loss of his machines. But he suspected that he'd always been alert ... until he'd come to Duo. Then it all didn't seem so important anymore.  
  
Quatre cocked his head. "So? How'd it go?"  
  
Heero heard the question and cringed. Damn Quatre's innocent curiosity. It really wasn't something he should talk about, especially behind Duo's back. And besides, how WAS it going? He didn't know. He couldn't blame Duo for wanting to think things out, for wanting them to not really get into a relationship. He could understand Duo's fear of the unknown, his uncertainty that this was really happening. But it all made things very difficult, and impossible to explain.  
  
Thankfully, Duo came racing down then, saving Heero from having to answer. A sheepish look was caught on the braided boy's face. "Uh, you're right, Q-man." He turned to Heero. "Uhh ... I kinda sorta-lied about the time."  
  
So that was what had happened. He had read the clock wrong when Hero had interrupted them earlier.  
  
Heero smiled reassuringly at him. Duo was obviously embarrassed about the tiny mess up, and he looked supremely cute with his blush. "That's okay, Duo." It took everything in him to not sweep Duo up and swing him around. He was just too damn alluring.  
  
Heero looked at Quatre, trying to tell him without saying anything that their intimacy level was none of his damn business. Quatre seemed to get the message, because he didn't ask again. Instead, he turned to Duo and smiled brightly.  
  
"So, how are you doing?"  
  
Duo snorted, shaking his head in mock exasperation. "He knows, Quatre. And I'm fine, just like the last time you asked."  
  
Heero found that Quatre had been hinting about Duo's scars. Quatre had asked almost innocently, and he hadn't caught the subtle innuendo. He supposed Quatre had always had that gift. He stared into Quatre's eyes, which had focused once again on his own. "Does he, now?" Quatre murmured speculatively. Heero matched his look with his own possessive expression.  
  
"I guess that answers my question for you," Duo said wryly, watching the exchange.  
  
Quatre turned intense gaze away from Heero, who was disturbingly thankful. "What do you ..." Quatre's eyes widened as he understood just what had been implied in Duo's words. "Duo! You know I'd never tell anyone! You made me promise!" Quatre looked wholly indignant. "Heero just said he wanted to see you. So, I told him where you lived."  
  
Duo sniffed. "Sure." Quatre seemed to bristle, but his reaction was spiritedly ignored. Duo cocked his head to the side, his braid swishing seductively against his thighs. "You want some food or something? I'm sure I could whip up something edible."  
  
Heero smirked, trying to swallow down his lust. "I could argue."  
  
Duo playfully swatted at him. "Hey, pal, you're supposed to be on my side!"  
  
Heero slung an arm over Duo's shoulders and bent to lean on him a bit, both to play along and to ease his body's odd need for him. "That better?"  
  
Duo tensed for only a second before leaning on Heero, too. "Yeah." He lifted his eyes, and violet and cobalt clashed. Heero saw as much need in Duo's amethyst orbs as he felt within himself. "Much."  
  
And, with his usual timing, Hero came up, barking and jumping onto Duo. Duo turned and hugged both of his heroes at once, getting a sloppy doggy kiss for his efforts. He laughed and looked back at Heero, who was watching them with a soft, sweet look on his face. Heero felt so protective of them, yet so light and free. He couldn't hope to explain the emotions whirling through him. Most of them were brand new. He felt possessiveness, protectiveness, care and need and love. But there were so many others, too - a strange fire of warmth that laced him to Duo's every movement. It was like a part of him was linked to his lover. All he knew was one thing: they were everything. And he was surprisingly okay with that. Even the fact that he'd risk his life for a dog. Okay, maybe that disturbed him a bit, but other than that, he was at peace with the changes inside him. Perhaps they weren't really changes as much as realizations.  
  
He bent down and played with Hero's ears, making the dog pant in ecstasy. He felt Duo's eyes on him, and looked up. Duo seemed to have the same feelings as he, for Heero knew that expression on his lover's face very well. It was what he felt whenever he saw Duo smile or laugh or joke around. How had he never seen it before, during the war? How had he been oblivious to both his own and Duo's wants? He'd been blind, and that tiny journal had helped him see.  
  
He realized that he'd completely forgotten about Quatre and stood, still scratching Hero's head. Quatre was beaming at him like he was a kid who'd gotten a difficult problem right. "I'm glad to see you two are getting to know one another. It's really nice, especially after all of the things you two had to go through during the war."  
  
Heero felt his face flush and concentrated fully on Hero's sensitive place behind his ears that made him pant and close his eyes in pooch paradise. He wondered if he could get Duo into that flushed state by playing in the same spot. It was definitely something to think about. He grinned wickedly at the visual that came with his mind's ponderings, then quickly hid it, lest Quatre saw it.  
  
"Um, actually, I came over to see if the two of you would like to go out to dinner with Trowa and myself tomorrow."  
  
Heero looked at Duo, pausing in his pleasuring of Hero, letting him know that the choice was Duo's to make. Duo sighed in irritation, but smiled brilliantly at Quatre. "Sure, Qat. We'd love to."  
  
Heero nodded, pleased. Duo had been willing to show their relationship with Quatre, but Heero knew he very well may not want to show the world. He, himself, wasn't quite ready. He was still used to looking inconspicuous, and two gay men together stood out like a blood-red rose in the middle of black roses. It was something from his training that would be hard to shake off. Being watched made him nervous.  
  
He could only wonder how Duo felt about it.  
  
"Great!" Quatre's excited voice brought Heero once again out of his musings. "Does 7:00 sound good?"  
  
"Sounds great, Qat." Duo answered almost tiredly. "Where is it?"  
  
"It's an oldies restaurant, with oldies food mixed with our own that we eat now. I don't know why we ever switched from that food," Quatre said, mostly to himself. He seemed to snap out of his daze and smiled. "We'll come to pick you guys up, or you can just follow us in your car. Does that sound good?"  
  
Heero decided to take over after seeing a flustered look on Duo's face. "Sure, Quatre, that sounds fine. Thank you."  
  
Quatre took it for the dismissal it was. "Wonderful. I've got to go get ready for the meeting now. I'll have another, then it's dinnertime. It was terrific to see the two of you again, Heero, Duo." He turned and prepared to go.  
  
"Quatre?"  
  
Quatre and Heero both turned to Duo, who had spoken Quatre's name quietly. He seemed unsure, and wouldn't even catch either of their eyes. They instead focused on his feet, which had slipped into shoes earlier. "What is it, Duo?" Quatre asked compassionately. Duo looked up with such an tentative face, it made Heero's heart bleed.  
  
"I ... was wondering if I could ... talk to you." He shot an apologetic look in Heero's general direction, but didn't make eye contact. "Take a walk or something." He looked quickly back to Quatre.  
  
Heero watched in worry. It seemed Duo had to reach into his little bowl of courage to get this out. He wanted to help, but didn't know what to do. Helplessness was a feeling he wasn't used to, and he found out quickly that he didn't like it.  
  
Quatre looked confused, but willing to help. "Of course, Duo." He turned to Heero, seeing that Duo wasn't going to make the effort. "We'll be back soon, alright?"  
  
Heero nodded dumbly, watching as they left out the door. The click of the doorknob sounded like the sound of a cell door slamming shut. He had to squelch the urge to run after them and grab Duo, hugging him and demanding reasons for his sudden change. What had just happened? His head still spun. What had he done?  
  
He looked at Hero for help, but the dog was looking at the door like he'd been abandoned. Perhaps he had been. Perhaps THEY had been. Heero moved to the window, the dog following dejectedly beside him. Heero noted almost unknowingly that Hero seemed to be an echo of Duo's moods. They seemed close. He wished he could be that close to his koi.  
  
Heero watched out, waiting for them, unconsciously caressing Hero. Where were they going? What were they talking about? Had he done something to screw this up? But what? What had he done? Other than barging in and practically demanding a relationship. Damn. He'd done this wrong. Duo was probably scared of him, or frightened of what he'd done. He felt sick. Should he leave? No, he couldn't. He couldn't leave Duo. Not after seeing him like this. Not after they'd joined like they had. If Duo told him to leave, he would. But until then, he'd stay. He could do nothing else.  
  
Hero whined, and Heero turned his head from the window to look at the golden retriever. "I know. I want him back, too." He looked back to the window, vowing that he'd take things slow and do only as Duo wanted. He wouldn't force him. He'd do anything, just as long as it meant they could stay together. He swore it.  
  
He'd go one step at a time. Even if he had to go back to the beginning. Every step that brought him closer to Duo was one worth taking, no matter how small. No matter what. // Just give the chance back, Duo, and I'll prove just how much I love you; just how much I need you. //  
  
*  
  
A/N: I know, I know, that was short, especially for two weeks worth of waiting. Gomen!!! I had to take another day off of school to get THIS much accomplished. Next year is gonna be even worse, because I'll have two AP courses, and those are very similar to college courses. *groans* I'm so sorry. The next one will be fairly short, too, but it'll be the Duo POV I've been asked for. I hope it'll meet everyone's expectations! Review now, please! It really makes me happy! Again, I'm dreadfully sorry for the immense wait! 


	15. Seeing Through the Storm

OMG, I'm finally back! Hallelujah! SO sorry I didn't get this out any earlier! I hope it's good enough for the immense wait you've suffered through!  
  
Beta Reader: But I'm a good lil beta n' returned this back to her the SAME day she gave it to me! So it's ALL her fault for the wait :P (don't worry..i still luv ya Kay-Kay)  
  
*Warning* - There is ANGST, sadness, SERIOUS cursing, some yummy thoughts, some sap, and, duuhh, I dunno, other stuff. There you go ...  
  
Disclaimer - I don't own Gundam Wing, or Duo, or Heero, or Quatre. What DO I own? Shit, hold on, I KNOW this one, dammit ...  
  
Footsteps  
  
Chapter 15  
  
Duo knew Quatre was watching him, worried and a little frightened. He wanted to hit himself for this, but he just had to talk about it to someone, and Quatre had been his confidante for years, even during the war when he was sobbing out his unrequited love for the Perfect Soldier. He needed the comfort that Quatre was so damned good at.  
  
"Qat ... it's about Heero."  
  
"What about him? Has he hurt you?"  
  
"No!" Duo was quick to assure. "At least ... no, not physically. It's just ..." He blew out a strangled breath and looked up from the sidewalk below his feet. Quatre's blonde hair shone in the lamplight and moonlight, making it look like he wore a halo. Had he really thought the boy capable of deceiving him with Heero? How stupid of him.  
  
"You're scared," Quatre whispered, and the braided man nodded jerkily, looking down to hide the sheen in his eyes. The two continued their walk in silence, finding nothing to say. Quatre was waiting for him to say something, actually, but Duo didn't seem to be ready to say much. Quatre gave him time. Duo knew he'd wait as long as necessary, even if that meant ditching the meeting and the people he had to see. But that wasn't fair.  
  
"God, I feel like such an asshole, leaving Heero like that," he started, rubbing a hand over his face. "God, what he must be thinking." He groaned and looked back to the sidewalk and walked on, forcing Quatre to do the same. They had hardly been aware of stopping in the first place, and they quickly fell back into an even rhythm with each other. "I just ... I had to talk to someone ... I just had to know that I wasn't ... that he really was here ... oh, God ..."  
  
"Duo?" Duo found himself unable to go on. He just couldn't move his feet anymore.  
  
"Quatre, just what is he ... I mean ... dammit, I don't know what I mean ..."  
  
"Duo, when Trowa and I first got together, we didn't really know if the other really wanted us, or if he wanted a stress-relief, or what."  
  
Duo looked at Quatre in shock, disbelieving that the curious, yet shy boy would be saying this. "But, we stuck it through, because, no matter how the other felt, we loved one another. It certainly wasn't easy, and not just because we were in the the middle of a war. But we *do* love each other. And I think ... I think Heero really does feel that way about you."  
  
"But *why*?!" Duo wailed. "Why now? I've felt this way about him since ... since ... *forever*! Why hasn't he come to me before?!" Duo lapsed into silence. Why was he so depressed about the one thing he'd once fantasized about. Was the dream gone? Had Heero waited too long?  
  
But even as he thought that, he knew it wasn't so. No, not at all. Even now, full of doubt and fear, he felt his heart screaming for Heero.  
  
Full of doubt and fear... that was it! It had nothing to do with Heero. It was all in him. He didn't know. He couldn't see Heero's thoughts, his reasons, and he was afraid, though of what he wasn't so sure. That Heero would leave him all alone again?  
  
Oh, he wished he could understand his emotions. Whenever he was with Heero, it was bittersweet. He was so afraid that he was dreaming, that it was just another fantasy, and he was going to find himself in the hospital again ...  
  
He shivered. `Please, if that's to happen, don't ever let me wake up.'  
  
"Duo, are you okay?"  
  
He shook himself free from the enveloping cloud of depression and smiled for Quatre. "Yeah, I'm fine, Qat. Did you say something?"  
  
"I was just saying that he might not have understood his feelings, or, if he did, that he couldn't let them be released, for fear of the mission and the war effort. He was trained to be the Perfect Soldier, we can't forget."  
  
"Yeah. God, what was that bastard J thinking?" He shook his head, losing the grin as quickly as it came. "But it's not him, Qat. It's me. I'm just so fucked up ..."  
  
"You are *not* ... messed up, Duo," Quatre argued, putting his hands on his hips. "You're just like everyone else in this world when it comes to love. You just love another man instead of a woman."  
  
"So, that means I'm not like everyone else, doesn't it?" Duo kidded, but stopped at the sad look in Quatre's eyes. "Shit, Qat, you know I didn't mean that in a bad way. You and Tro ..."  
  
"No, I know, Duo," Quatre sighed. "But, don't you see? You deserve as much as anybody else. You deserve more credit than you give yourself."  
  
"Quatre, I'm a fucking street rat," Duo laughed sardonically. "I don't deserve a damn thing."  
  
"Duo, dammit, knock it off! You *are* worth it, you *are* a good person! Why don't you see that?!"  
  
"Because, Quatre my man," Duo started, knowing he was skating thin ice and too confused inside to care, "I'm depressed!" He laughed then, as if the fact was absolutely fucking hilarious. Wasn't it? Duo, the one who always laughed, who always joked and smiled and teased, was fucking suicidal. Ironic? Hell, yeah. Shouldn't it be Trowa, or Heero?  
  
No! No one else deserved this except him. Or was that the depression talking? God, he needed Heero. When he was with him, he didn't think about his sadness, or his pain and depression. Sure, he thought of his grotesque scars, but Heero treated his body reverently. His heart soared in memory of Heero's touch. It had been lovemaking, no matter what he said. He needed Heero. He'd always needed Heero.  
  
"Thanks, Qat," he said suddenly, and knew that his friend was getting just as confused as he'd been mere moments before. But that one thing made him sure of one thing: he wanted to be with Heero. For however long it lasted. Be it a day or a lifetime, he'd take the time he had with the one he loved. He'd make love with Heero, and this time they'd both see it for what it was: the mating of two souls in an embrace matched by no little hug. Soul mates. His soul was mated with Heero's. He'd take the pain when it came. For now, he'd take the love offered to him.  
  
Heero ...  
  
"What'd I do?" Quatre asked, but Duo was already turning around. "Hey, Qat, I don't want to be rude, but could you see yourself to your car? I gotta be with Heero right now."  
  
He heard Quatre's enormous grin in his voice as he spoke. "Of course, Duo."  
  
He broke out into a run then, needing to get to Heero. He wanted to be with him now, before he woke up to find that it had been another dream. Another hallucination of drugs or sadness or just his lonely heart. He wanted to see Heero's eyes glazed with passion one more time, taste his sweet taste upon his lips, feel his body move on his, his member trapped within him. One more time. A thousand more times. More than that. He wanted it until he couldn't breathe for the passions being released inside him, and then even more.  
  
He wanted Heero like never before. Fuck his fear, his inhibitions. They could drown themselves for all he cared. Tonight, it was him and Heero. Just them. Nothing and no one else.  
  
He raced up the stairs to his house and burst through the door. His eyes were immediately drawn to the sight of the man standing in the middle of the living room floor, staring at him with open cobalt eyes and trembling lips. "Heero," he gasped, and he rushed into the man's arms. "Oh, God, Heero," he sobbed, and found himself close to tears. Heero's arms came around him, and he snuggled within the warmth of his love's arms, feeling sheltered for the first time since he'd been with Sister Helen. He snuggled into Heero's chest, breathing in deep and trying stupidly to fight the sudden tears. "Don't leave me," he whispered.  
  
"I can't, love," Heero rasped, and the arms around him tightened. "I can't leave you."  
  
"I want you to stay with me. I want ... Heero ..." he pulled away, knowing that his eyes were rimmed with tears and not rightly giving a damn. His lover was looking at him tenderly, achingly strong. And that made him bold enough to speak his next words. "Make love to me, Heero. Please."  
  
*  
  
A/N: Bwahahahahahahah!!! I LEFT IT THERE, SUCKERS! Hahahahahah!!! Well, what do you think? Did it suck balls? Was it good? I found it strangely easy to do Duo. I guess I'd been doing him in my mind the whole time, and now I was just getting it down. Weird, huh? Oh, well! Tell me how it was in a review? Please? Peeese? 


	16. Rainbows

Well, here's the scene I left off evilly last time. Here you go; hope it's good! ... That was a short hi, but I want you to get to the other stuff, since I've been bugged at school enough about it. sighsI could hurt you, Andi ...  
  
Warning - THERE IS YAOI LEMON. 1x2, MAJOR 1x2 overload here, okay? Okay. Thanks much. Oh! And some cursing. And lots and lots of sap. My wife's muse knocked out Kanashii glares evilly at Pandaso I'm stuck with plain romance for a while.  
  
Sorry about the wait, everybody ... cries Will you accept my apologies and continue reading my story?  
  
Disclaimer - I own nothing. Not Heero, not Duo, nor whatever brand of lube they're using. sighs again, rather dramatically ...  
  
Footsteps  
  
Chapter 16  
  
Heero's eyebrows shot up in surprise. He had thought that Duo wanted them ... gods, when Duo'd been out, he'd started going over every single thing he'd said and done, scared that he'd lost the chance to be with his love. And then he came in, looking more like a lost puppy than an ex-Gundam pilot. And he'd flung himself into Heero's arms.  
  
And he was still there.  
  
"You want me to ... you want to ..." And it was then that he realized their exact position. Duo's legs were inside his own, his member firmly against him. He hissed as Duo moved a bit, then looked down into his koi's eyes. "Are you sure?" he finally rasped.  
  
Duo's eyes were almost fever bright. "Yes." His voice was just as rough. "I am."  
  
Heero growled in satisfaction and promptly swept Duo up into his arms. "Better be sure, because I won't be able to stop when we get up there."  
  
Duo sighed and snuggled into his chest, making his steps falter for a moment. "Good," was Duo's passioned whisper.  
  
Heero had questions, but didn't want to waste this moment asking them. The one foremost in his mind was: did this mean Duo wanted more than just sex?  
  
He kicked open the bedroom door and brought Duo through the threshold. Duo's eyes stayed on his face, and he stopped at the foot of the bed to lock eyes with him. "Duo," he murmured, "I don't want a romp on the bed. If that's --"  
  
"No." Duo shook his head adamantly, but kept his amethyst eyes locked on Heero. "I want ... more than that. If you want to give it."  
  
Duo's hesitant words were Heero's downfall, and he placed Duo gently on the bed, making sure he had lube within arm's reach before settling himself on top of the braided boy. "Duo," he said, leaning his body on Duo gently, having their erections meet. Duo gasped, his eyes glazing a bit. "Duo, look at me." Slowly, his lover did as he was asked. "I have wanted to give this to you for a long time now." His hands rubbed down Duo's arms, lifting them up and looking at them, kissing the place where each scar started. "I'll never give you the reason to do this again." Guilt gripped him; the scars reminded him of just how fragile his seemingly invincible lover really was.  
  
"Heero, the scars ... I'm sorry ..."  
  
Heero descended enough to kiss Duo full on the lips, making Duo melt beneath him. Desire surged hot in his veins, but he had to get this out. He forced himself to break the kiss. Duo whimpered, and Heero groaned with the irrepressible need to kiss his koi again. "Duo, it's my fault, not yours ... good God, I should've been here. I'm the one who should be apologizing, koi ... I'm so sorry ..."  
  
"Heero ..." And Duo leaned up to take his lips again. Heero let himself fall into Duo's embrace, allowed himself to savor the taste of Duo's mouth, that elusive taste that reminded him of everything he loved. It was just Duo, and it made him go crazy with need. "Heero, it's me ... Can you really deal with someone like me? I'm so messed up ..."  
  
"You're perfect," Heero argued, and broke the kiss only long enough to take Duo's shirt off before claiming that sweetness once more. "Perfect," he repeated, his hands moving from Duo's wrists to his ribcage, moving up and down. Duo shivered beneath him, and Heero shivered with him. "You're everything." His hands came up to skim over Duo's nipples, and a hard gasp was his reward. He skimmed above them, touching them feather-light before moving back down to Duo's stomach.  
  
"Heero," Duo groaned, trying to grab Heero's hands. Heero took them away, removing his shirt as an excuse. Duo's hands touched his chest as soon as it was exposed, and the American rubbed over his nipples. He moaned and grabbed Duo's hands in one of his, braceleting them and holding them over Duo's head. Duo opened his mouth to protest, but Heero bent down and kissed him until he didn't know what was up or down, let alone what he was arguing about.  
  
Heero's hand came to lightly touch the very tip of Duo's nipple. Duo arched his back up, and Heero took his hand away before Duo got the pressure he was seeking.  
  
Duo cried out in sexual frustration. "Dammit, Heero, TOUCH ME!"  
  
Heero responded instantaneously, taking Duo's nipple into his mouth. Duo cried out again, but this time ecstasy was what darkened his voice. Heero let go of Duo's hands, and they were instantly on his chest, running over his nipples and then around his back, bringing him closer, arching his back. Heero heard another growl rip through him, and did nothing to stop it. He brought his hands to the end of Duo's braid, sifting his hands through it until it was loose and free. His hands tangled themselves within the impressive mass and licked over Duo's nipple one more time before dipping his tongue into Duo's navel, plunging once, then twice.  
  
Duo's hands splayed across his back, his pinkies curving on the beginning of Heero's buttocks. Heero groaned at the jeans guarding that flesh from being touched, and set to fix the problem. Duo hurriedly did the same, and they were both soon naked. Heero immediately returned to Duo, kissing him breathless, making his tongue plunge in and out over and over again. Just what he wanted to do with Duo's entire body. With Duo's entrance to his soul.  
  
"Soul mates," Duo whispered reverently, as if reading Heero's thoughts.  
  
"Forever yours," Heero gasped, and finally pulled his mouth loose. His hands fell to the shaft of Duo's member, and he felt Duo tense and relax all at one as his fingers closed around his heat. He pumped it slowly, once, and Duo's hips lifted, trying to get his to do it harder, faster. Heero kept his pace agonizingly slow.  
  
"Heero," Duo breathed, but couldn't seem to say more.  
  
Heero's breath was quick and shallow, his body going wild at the sight of Duo's obvious ecstasy. The boy thrashed his head from side to side, his hair about him in tangles of shining chestnut. His face was flushed, his eyes in slits that were tiny pools of violet passion. He was absolutely beautiful. Heero wanted to go in him hard and fast, but stopped himself. He wanted this to be perfect for Duo.  
  
"What, Duo?" he asked softly, almost in a demand. His hand slipped slowly up, then down, Duo groaned, looking about to go wild.  
  
"Dammit, Heero," Duo growled, "faster!" He tilted his head back, showing off his gleaming neck and the droplets of sweat that ran down onto his chest. Heero licked one up, going just a bit faster for Duo, pumping him harder. Duo lifted his hips to each thrust, matching him with a clawing urgency that took Heero's breath away.  
  
Heero slowly went faster, then a bit faster, until Duo's need was quenched and he was eagerly matching Heero's every move.  
  
Heero removed his hand.  
  
"HEERO!" Duo cried, then whimpered, his hands digging into Heero's back and trying to bring him back. Heero managed to squirm away, grabbing the lube and soundly lathering himself. He looked at Duo, again seeing the beauty in his lover's face. His lips were parted, and he was gasping, and Heero had to bend over and nip the rosy lips until Duo groaned. "Heero, I NEED you to ..." He thrashed his head. "NOW!!!"  
  
Heero smiled thinly, feeling his own member throbbing. It was intoxicating, seeing the effects he had on the man he loved. He slid a finger into Duo's slick member, feeling an electric shock spring through his body at Duo's throaty moan. He saw that Duo was close to coming and hurried, readying him as quickly as he dared, feeling himself get so hard it hurt as he listened to the groans and mews of his koi.  
  
Then he eased himself up, looking at the sweat-soaked features of his one and only, feeling a tightening in his heart. I almost lost him.But he wouldn't dwell on the past when everything he wanted was right here in the present.  
  
"Open your eyes, Duo," he murmured, and watched in wonder as Duo's eyes flickered open, dark as violet in his passion. "I want to see you when I enter you."  
  
And Heero gently placed the tip of his member against Duo's entrance, waiting for a moment before entering just a bit. Duo almost closed his eyes, but kept them open as requested. Heero kept his own trained on those orbs, reading the passion, the hunger, and, yes, the love. He slipped out, and Duo's eyes did close then, as a blissful agony tore at his lover's insides. Heero finally entered Duo fully, and Duo let out a cry of triumph and joy, one Heero couldn't help but join. They stayed still like that for a few moments, but their increased passion couldn't be denied, and they started to move, slowly at first but quickly becoming hurried, as needs and desire and everything Heero had once thought he'd never feel raced through them, and he was in awe of the cliff before him, unafraid. He felt his body tilt on that precipice before falling into the ocean of pleasure that rocked his system. He heard Duo call out his name, and he answered it, collapsing on top of his lover. His body was practically dead, but his heart and soul felt more alive than ever.  
  
That was most definitely love they had made. He rolled off of Duo, afraid of hurting, and Duo curled within his arms, tucking his head into Heero's shoulder and smiling softly against the flushed skin. Heero took a long, sweet breath, drawing in the smell of sandalwood that always accompanied Duo. "I love you," he murmured, and he felt Duo go stock still.  
  
"R-Really?" Duo whispered. "Do you mean it?"  
  
"Of course," he murmured softly. "Since when have I said something I didn't mean?"  
  
There was an exhausted chuckle, then, "I love you, too, Heero Yuy."  
  
Heero's heart curled with warmth, and he wrapped Duo tighter in his arms as he fell into peaceful repose.  
  
A/N: Holy shit, it got hot in here damn quick. Anyways, please review and tell me how this went. Remember that this is just my second lemon ever, so please don't be too mean. I'm gonna go turn the A/C lower ... holy shit, I'm hot ...  
  
Okay, I am really, really sorry about my quitting the comp. business. It seems like the thing's being nicer, so I'm gonna try this again. However, my classes are even worse than last year - I have two AP (Advanced Placement) courses, my math and Spanish classes, and mythology, which, thankfully, is a fairly breezy class. All in all, I'm probably going to take forever getting these out. Really sorry about that, too.  
  
My e-mail has changed, if anyone was really ticked about that. My old one got full because of all the beautiful reviews from you guys, so I started a new one. To KoalaBear1331, I would be honored if you wanted to put the poem on your website. I had named the thing "Whisper," but I think your name is even better. I would love to talk to you through my new e-mail; it's This is also to anyone else who wants to e-mail me, even if it's to yell.  
  
Extreme apologies to BiPanda and Dragen Eyes, who are probably ready to kill me. Sorry?  
  
Luv you all; gotta go! Be good and review if you're still even checking these things! 


	17. Pots of Gold

Well, here I am, up past my bedtime, screwing myself over for tomorrow - yes, I still have school - and getting this out. But you don't want to hear my sob stories, so here you go! 

WARNING - There's some cursing and lots of sap and I can't think of anything else, so enjoy!

Disclaimer - I own nothing. Gundam Wing is owned by Bandai, and Heero is Duo's and vice-versa. Take it from me, folks, it's better to leave them with each other. They're very territorial...

Footsteps

Chapter 17

Heero found himself waking up slowly for the first time he could remember. He felt at peace, happy. Content. Warm.

And then he remembered just where he was, what had happened last night ... what Duo had told him. He found Duo wrapped in his arms, his hands on Heero's chest, his right leg caught between Heero's, his hair a tangled mass flowing all over the bed. Heero buried his face in Duo's throat for a moment and breathed deeply of Duo's essence. Then he leaned back a bit and waited for Duo to wake.

He couldn't believe ... he didn't know what had happened with Quatre, but it had lifted something from inside him. He'd been able to reach out. Heero didn't know what happened, yes ... but he wanted to thank Quatre. Or God. Or somebody. He had his Duo. And, it seemed, he would have him for a while to come.

Thank you.

Heero watched as The sunlight filtered in through a window by Duo's dresser. The light played on the strands of Duo's hair, giving them an eerie golden light not unlike a halo. Heero's lips upturned at the thought, the purely whimsical thought of his angel that was produced by his own suddenly romantic mind. Actually, it was almost horrifying how romantic he'd become. And since when?

Didn't matter. Duo was here, with him, and he'd make sure they stayed this way. His stomach roiled with guilt and worry about the diary. He hadn't read any more since that first night when he'd first seen Duo again. He had to tell Duo, before he found out. He had to explain to the American that he had come in response to the diary, not because of some sort of pity party, but because it opened his eyes. He had to do it soon, so that it wouldn't break a bond of trust; so that it would form a stronger one instead. And he had to do it soon.

After Quatre's dinner,' he promised himself, then thought about it. Duo hadn't seemed too enthusiastic over the prospect of having dinner with Quatre and Trowa, who Heero believed was Quatre's lover. If Duo didn't want to do it, then he would call it off. Let him seem like an asshole if that was what it took to calm Duo down. Then he'd spring his little surprise on his koi.

Wanting to skip those thoughts, he moved over a bit and felt Duo's knee go into contact with his member. The hard-on was instantaneous, almost painful. But at least now he could see the clock on the nightstand opposite him.

It was 7:16 in the morning, a fact that probably meant that Duo would not be waking up soon. Heero was fine with that. It gave him more time to study his lover's face as he slept.

The man looked almost innocent, despite everything Heero knew he'd seen. War. Death. The church. He agonized over his love's pain, found himself sweeping tiny strands of hair out of his face. It didn't seem right that Duo had to see that. Though he supposed that wasn't fair, since he'd seen things horrible, as well. He just ... never lost everyone. He lost someone who was a father figure, he supposed, but ... he never saw the man that way. He certainly didn't think of Doctor J that way.

Didn't matter. Seems he'll be seeing that a lot now. Everything that had once been didn't matter now. He had to move forward. He had a whole life ahead of him, something he never would have deemed possible during the war. He never would have thought twice about being with Duo. He was a soldier. A warrior. Soldiers had no room or time for love. None at all. And so every person was a liability. They could betray you; they could mess up your performance. And Duo was most definitely distracting. And could betray him. Just not in battle. Duo never betrayed him in battle. Duo allowed himself to be pulled recklessly along after him in battle.

He did it willingly. He always thought it was because the American was reckless and stupid. Reckless, maybe a bit. But he never had been and never will be stupid. Perhaps he'd been the reckless one, and Duo had been watching out for him.

Yes, Heero thought. Maybe that was exactly what had happened, right underneath his disdainful nose.

Duo twitched in Heero's arms, and Heero's attention zeroed in on his lover's face. The eyes flickered, then opened to point drowsy amethyst eyes in his direction. A lazy smile curved Duo's heart-shaped face, and Duo scooted away to stretch, his muscles rippling in the golden sunlight. Heero's loins tightened quickly.

He watched, a bit masochistically, as Duo arched his back, then as he turned back to Heero. "G'morning," he yawned, and Heero thought he heard the boy's jaw crack.

"Morning, sleepyhead," he murmured, aroused beyond belief by nothing more than a stretch and a yawn. His internal clock told him that about 45 minutes had passed, meaning that it was around 8:00. Interesting, he mused. Was it habit or coincidence that got Duo awake around now?

"M'not a sleepyhead," Duo said, more to say something than to argue, and the effect would have been lost anyway, seeing as he seemed to have his mouth trapped in his yawn, anyway.

Heero took great pleasure from watching Duo's morning ritual. "Do you always wake up ready for battle?" he teased, then caught himself. Duo, oblivious, only laughed.

"Ug."

"Oh, a likely story," Heero said, and won another chuckle. He looked out the window again, saw a bird fly past, and decided that they had better get up. Or, maybe, he thought, they could stay in bed. Not sleep, maybe, but stay in bed.

"Most people believe it," Duo mumbled, his eyes drooping. "When did you wake up?"

"About an hour ago?"

"Oh." Duo looked almost sheepish. "Do you want up?"

"No," Heero said automatically. "I want to stay here, watching you."

Duo blushed to his roots, making Heero laugh. Duo's eyes came up to scan his face, seeming to memorize it. "What?" he asked, feeling a bit off-center.

"You just never laughed before. During the war," he elaborated when I was about to object.

I had to seriously think about it - a hard thing to do when in bed with your lover butt naked beside you, staring at you with sleepy, I'm-in-love-with-you eyes. If I tried to see myself laughing during the war, it was ... impossible. Duo was right. "I had nothing to laugh about then," I whispered, then looked back into his eyes. "I didn't know I had you."

Duo blushed heatedly. "But ... surely ... if you looked ..."

"But my eyes couldn't see," Heero told him softly. "I couldn't see anything beautiful. Everything in my mind was ugly. And I thought everything in the Universe was just as grotesque as me."

"But Heero-!"

Heero shrugged it off, pleased that Duo wanted to argue for his goodness. "It's true. I was ugly. A part of me still is, and I don't think it will ever change. But," he added, seeing that Duo was about to interject again, "now I can start over. The war is over, and therefore, my need to be ugly and despicable. And I was despicable."

"No, Heero, you were everything I wished I could have been!" Duo shouted angrily, pushing himself up onto his elbow, glaring down into Heero's stunned face. "You were objective, you were smart. You could do anything! You weren't afraid of dying if it meant the mission was completed. I was afraid of everything. What if? What if I killed an innocent? What if I messed up and got an ally hurt? What about Quatre? What about ..." Duo faltered, then pushed on. "What if I wasn't good enough, and got you killed?"

Duo's words flew threw Heero like ice. "Duo, I wouldn't have-"

"Shut up," Duo snapped, "I'm not done. You, on the other hand," he continued, "weren't afraid of what could happen. You were strong, capable. You'd been born for the cockpit. Not me. I was a ... a street rat, a thief. I didn't belong in the battlefield, alongside warriors like you and Trowa and Fei. I ... I wished I was just like you every day. I wished I didn't see ... others in the nameless faces that I fought."

Slightly winded and confused, Duo finished with, "you were perfect, Heero. You still are. You've never ... EVER ... been ugly."

"I want to believe what you say," Heero said slowly. "But-"

"No buts!" Duo smiled suddenly. "This is a really stupid argument."

Heero thought about it and smiled. "And you're trying to change the subject."

Duo laughed outright. "Yeah." He frowned then. "I feel like we have something to do, though..."

"Quatre's invitation. love," Heero reminded him gently, and watched as his eyes sparked, then clouded. "What's wrong?"

Duo shook his head, his eyes dropping. "I just ... always hated going out with Quatre and Trowa," he said quietly. "They are ... very ... beautiful together..."

"Do you think that we're ugly together?" Heero asked, noting that his voice got a bit stoic and unable to prevent it.

Duo's eyes were wide in horror as his eyes fled from the bed sheets to Heero's face. "No!" he cried with such enthusiasm that Heero felt his entire body sag in relief before he knew he was tense.

"Then what would be the problem with being with me when we go to the restaurant?" Heero asked, innocently curious.

Duo seemed surprised. "You want to go?"

Heero smiled for Duo. "Of course."

"But ... you seemed so reluctant ..." Duo told him.

Heero shook his head. It seemed that they were going to still misunderstand each other a bit, despite having made love twice now. "It was your decision to make, not mine."

"Oh." Heero quirked an eyebrow, and Duo grinned sheepishly. "So, uh, I guess you don't know where Quatre usually chooses to eat?"

Heero groaned. "Let me guess ... a disgustingly fancy restaurant?"

Duo nodded, trying to swallow a grin.

Heero sighed theatrically and stood. "Lucky me," he muttered, looking down at his lover. "Thankfully, I was dumb enough to grab a tuxedo when I came here. I was ... a bit reckless with what I snatched."

Heero left Duo to consider his words and dragged out his suitcase from the linen closet in Duo's hallway, dug through and grabbed his tux. It was a bit wrinkled, but irons had been invented, so he thought he'd survive. He turned and saw Duo looking at him appraisingly, boxers covering his lower body. "You're walking through my house naked," Duo informed him, and Heero noticed he was.

"The problem?"

Duo's eyes were bright. "Take a guess."

Heero's grin was close to feral. "Ah. Well, we do need to get changed, so..." His grin was practically wicked then. "Looks like we'll have to suffer."

Duo growled, but it was more lust than agitation. "You're going to be hell to live with, aren't you?"

Heero's grin only widened. Well, well. Duo was seriously considering him moving in and living with him. Excellent.

"Well, since you're Shinigami, you should be right at home with me," Heero said flippantly, and earned a bark of a laugh for his efforts. Duo walked off then.

Heero listened as he walked around his room, then came out and stepped back into Heero's line of vision. His eyes stared at the wall as he held his hand out, and Heero struggled not to laugh. "Here, I'll iron your clothes."

"Thank you," Heero murmured, touched despite Duo's modesty, which in itself was quite charming, if one didn't take it personally. He handed his clothes over to the American, who swept off again.

Perhaps others would think they were getting ready too early, but both held their appearances in high regard. They didn't want people passing them to mutter, "oh, they must be ex-pilots. Look at how scruffy they are!" behind their backs. Or, at least, that was Heero's reason. Don't let anyone suspect anything. For Duo, Heero thought, thinking back to what Duo had said earlier, it could be because he had been a street rat. That experience may have made him want to look respectable to the public - a sort of "see? I'm not just some trash on the side of the road!" to everyone looking.

In any case, they mutually decided that they wouldn't eat and save their stomachs from internal combustion later on in the day. It was noon before they were ready to consider putting on clothes. They ate a quick snack - temptation, and all that. Duo seemed to be getting a little edgy, and Heero gave him a reassuring kiss that made Duo's eyes water a bit. When they pulled apart, Duo ran off to the shower, and Heero waited patiently for his turn.

Duo really was worried about this dinner, Heero realized, and he wasn't certain how to calm his koi down. He thought about it for a good fifteen minutes, but then Duo yelped and he ended up with a soapy body in his arms, water soaking his still-bare body, and they ended up taking his shower with Duo.

A good hour later, they were toweling off. Duo became almost obsessed with appearance, and Heero finally just plucked the brush from his hands when he started rebraiding his hair for the tenth time.

Finally, the two were ready to go with merely an hour left. Duo kept messing up his tie, his fingers trembling, and Heero fixed it for him, smiling reassuringly. Duo's smile was a bit tremulous. "Duo-love, what's the problem?"

Duo's grin faded entirely. "I don't know!" he stated restlessly, then started raking his hands through his hair. He nervously made them fall to his sides again. "I don't understand what my problem is. It hasn't been this bad since ... since the first time I went out with the guy. I just ... I don't want-"

"It's about me," Heero finished. "You're worried about me somehow."

"Yes," Duo hissed in irritation, but I don't know WHY."

Heero leaned against the door, watching Duo as he nervously fiddled with his tie. "I can take care of myself."

"I know that," Duo snapped. "I just don't know ... other stuff."

Heero's eyebrow did that lifting thing again. "Other stuff?"

Duo's eyes skimmed right over Heero's face. "You know, like ... like how you and Trowa are going to-"

"We are on friendly terms," Heero stated firmly, "as are Quatre and myself. I've stayed in touch; it's only been a few months."

"Kiss my ass," Duo muttered, and Heero's grin told Duo that he very much wanted to. "Smart-ass."

Heero was about to retort, but the doorbell rang at that precise moment, and Heero felt his voice gentle. "You ready?" he said instead, and waited for Duo's shaky nod before turning to the door.

A/N: There you go! All nice and pretty and long! 2600 words! How about that??? Well, review, and if I get more than last time, I'll post! Yes, this is blackmail. Thank you very much!


	18. Leprechaun Kiss

Hi. I'm back. Yee-hah. 

**Disclaimer** - They aren't mine, which I'm sure shocks and appalls the lot of you.

_**WARNING**_: angst, yaoi goodness, some fluff, maybe some cursing.

* * *

_**Footsteps**_

**Chapter 18**

* * *

Quatre stepped into the room immediately, throwing his arms around Heero, then Duo, then watching Trowa as HE stepped in, looking both amused and long-suffered by Quatre's antics. He nodded to Heero, smiling slightly at the man's stunned expression, then went to Duo's side, gently prying his lover off of his neck. "Calm down, Quatre," he said quietly, and Quatre's excited face bounced up to him. 

Duo looked at Heero and swiftly went to his side. The Japanese man shook his head and stared at his lover with a look that plainly said that he was fine, even though he hadn't been expecting the sudden physical contact. He turned back to his guests and smiled for them. "Hey, Qat," he spoke, and Quatre turned to him, looking at Heero and smiling sheepishly at him, figuring out what he'd done.

"Hi, Duo. Are you both ready to go?"

Duo almost nodded for yes, but then turned to Heero. When his boyfriend nodded, then he smiled and answered with a simple, "yeah, we're ready."

In all honesty, Duo was entirely too nervous. He followed Heero out, and Heero wisely decided to take his own car and follow Quatre and Trowa to the restaurant. Duo sat in the passenger seat, his face already smiling as he yammered away. Heero could only remember what had been in Duo's journal, what the young American had said about everyone thinking he was happy. Now, he could see it easily. The worry behind the smile. Something in his chest tightened.

"Don't, love."

Duo turned to the sound of his voice, confused. "Don't what?"

"Don't do this." Heero turned a corner and kept his eyes on the road, leaving Duo's eyes so he could say what he knew Duo needed to hear.

"Don't do what?"

Duo was starting to get angry, from the sound of it. He decided it was time to elaborate. "Don't pretend for me, or for them. Be yourself. We won't hate you for who you are. We've seen the worst sides of you already, haven't we?"

Duo gaped. "I... I... what!" His back snapped. "Dude, I'm not pretending-"

"Your pulse rate was intense in the house, and I do not doubt that it still is - maybe even more so now. You were nervous. You're trying to make me laugh now." His voice, Heero noted, was sounding sharp, so he gentled it. "You don't need to hide behind your mask anymore."

Duo could only stare at him wide-eyed for about three blocks, then shook his head. "Thank you," the young man whispered, and his head turned down to study the floor.

And stayed there.

Heero kept glancing at Duo, but couldn't figure out what he should say. Duo looked so... happy? Wistful, and scared, too. Heero pieced everything together and then carefully spoke again. "We're your friends, Duo, so you don't need to be afraid of rejection. We've always loved listening to you - that's right, even Wufei and me, so don't give me that look. I know I, at least, want to see every single part of you. I want to see you shine, and I want to see you cry, if only so that I can take those tears away. But if you hide every single time you're hurt or scared, I'll never be able to help you." Heero looked at Duo very intensely then. "And if I can't help you, then I feel useless. Let me be there for you. Please. From now on."

Duo's eyes then seemed to sparkle, like an amethyst dug out from the ground and cleaned for the first time in its life. Duo quickly turned his head away. It took Heero hardly any effort to continue driving as he grabbed Duo's chin and made Duo face him. Though the tears hadn't fallen, they were there, glimmering in Duo's eyes. "You're hiding again," Heero whispered, and it made a small smile flit across Duo's face.

"Sorry," Duo whispered, and was silenced when Heero's thumb rubbed against his lips.

"Shh," Heero ordered, managing to turn again without looking at the road. "I had a mask too, you know. It made things... easier, I thought. But it almost lost me everything. I don't want you to feel that sort of fear anymore. The fear that you would hurt yourself by being unable to face your dreams. I couldn't face you during the war, when my mask was all I had. I was terrified, because I knew that having one would mean I would lose the other."

"I... I'm sorry... I didn't know..."

Heero smiled and finally turned back to the road, letting go of Duo to again hold the wheel. "I know you didn't. My mask was very well honed." Heero found that his voice was bitter. "I didn't really have a choice. It was either the mask... or death."

"The same for me," Duo told Heero sadly. "I had to laugh for the other kids... the other street rats I grew up with. Even when I was in the orphanage, there were other kids, and I was their leader. I had to be both ruthless and kind, smart and funny. The mask made that a lot easier. And after a while..." Duo's voice trailed off.

"Habit," Heero finished for him.

Duo nodded. "Exactly."

Heero nodded too, and then they were silent. Heero's glance flicked over to Duo once, twice, three times, then he said, "do you know where they're taking us?"

Duo blinked a few times in confusion, trying to find out what Heero was talking about. When he did, he burst out laughing. "Wow, Heero," he teased, "subtle!"

Heero only smiled. "Well?"

Duo thought for a minute, then shrugged. "I dunno. Quatre didn't tell me. Undoubtedly it's someplace really fancy." Duo bit his lip. "That would be why we wore the fancy outfits." Duo gave him a sly glance. "In which you look VERY yummy, by the way."

Heero laughed. "Save it for the main course, Duo."

"But, you know," and now Duo's look was positively wicked, "I've always loved dessert so much more..."

Heero laughed again. "Are you saying that I'm better than a steak?"

"Much better," Duo agreed, rubbing his hand up Heero's arm.

Immediately goose bumps itched themselves over Heero's skin, sensitive to Duo's touch. His mind flashed back to their night together, and Heero almost groaned. At Duo's gasp, though, he turned to his lover immediately in alarm. Duo's eyes were wide. "What's wrong?" Heero asked.

"I can't believe you actually... you know..." Duo made a helpless gesture that told Heero nothing more than what Duo had just said. "All I did was..."

Heero actually felt his brain click into place. "Oh." He smiled. "Yeah. About that... maybe the touching should be kept down to a minimum, or else we'll never get past the appetizers."

Duo got his lecherous smirk back. "Are you saying that you aren't an appetizer?"

"I thought we just agreed that I was dessert?"

"We're debating the sexual merits of waiting until dessert, too," Duo told him haughtily.

"Are we now?" Heero stopped at the upcoming red light, turned, and kissed Duo full on the mouth.

Duo's lips were warm and pliant and opened for him immediately. With a growl of satisfaction, Heero plunged his tongue into that sweet concave, letting go of the wheel to grab Duo's shoulders and thrust themselves together, body to body and to hell with the suits they were wearing. Duo's reaction was instantaneous; he threw his hands around Heero and twined them in his hair, thrusting his chest until they were completely meshed into one another, their bodies touching on every pore, backs arched, lips locked. The taste of Duo was everywhere, filling each and every one of Heero's senses until he couldn't think, couldn't breathe. Had they been together only a few short hours ago? It had been too long. Too long...

Heero turned his head for greater access, crushing his lips to Duo's with an almost bruising force, and when Duo moaned deep into Heero's mouth, control snapped completely.

BEEEEEP! BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!

Heero jumped away from Duo, banging his head against the ceiling of the car, He turned to look through the windshield, only to see that the light had changed. He wanted to laugh at the irony - being told to go and having to stop. He hit the gas and held the wheel with trembling hands. He used one to rake back his hair, feeling the sweat on his brow.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Duo thunk his head against the dash and groan. "We'll never make it to the restaurant," he groaned, and Heero found himself agreeing.

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**A/N**: Well, it's not too long, but at least it's out. I'm going to finish these stories if it kills me. I just... am not going to be very reliable about it. Actually, the main reason I wrote this is because I got a review after so long not getting any. It made me want to write some more. Thank you so much, Noroi-Inu! 


	19. The Sun's Realization

Disclaimer - Gundam Wing is not mine. Duh.

Warnings: Language, yaoi, and ... angst. Possibly other stuff, as well.

* * *

Heero found it a miracle to be in the restaurant without his clothes rumpled or... absent. The place reminded him of palaces and a place he'd read about called the Taj Mahal. He felt immediately uncomfortable.

"It's like a mansion," Duo mumbled, and Heero could tell that he was uncomfortable, too. He stepped a bit closer to Duo in reassurance and was rewarded with a hundred-watt smile.

Quatre was absolutely ecstatic over the chance to celebrate "their coming together" by extravagant means. Trowa looked a bit put out, but he still smiled indulgently at his lover.

"Come, I've made a reservation." Quatre led them to the front door, a massive structure that looked to be made of marble. It had 3-D stone figures etched in it, little angels miraculously covered by falling scarves and leaves from unknown sources. Duo carefully touched one as they were all led into the restaurant by a doorman wearing a tux. Thank God he and Duo had thought to dress up.

The inside was just as luxurious. The entrance was just like those of the Taj Mahal, like those Arabian openings with elaborate paint around the door. This paint was red and yellow, twirling around each other in mock stripes. Inside were unnecessary columns like in Rome, spiraled poles and ionic decorations at the top. The columns were unadorned and looked like marble. Beyond the columns was a huge lobby, the ground also marble and smooth. People walked through, all dressed extravagantly. Women wore long, slinky dresses, some adorned with boas or gloves. Men were all dressed in tuxedos, most black. Heero's first thought was, i at least we're inconspicuous. /i Until he realized that all of these people looked at home in their clothes. He and Duo would stick out despite their clothes. It was a good thing they were with Quatre.

Their steps echoed as they walked through the lobby. Quatre, having not even blinked at the lobby or its decorations (including a painting that took up the entirety of one wall, showing a picture of a woman holding a baby with men surrounding her and a dove flying out of a ray of light, guarded by a guard with a forbidding face), was talking about how excited he was to see the two of them finally together. Trowa was a silent companion at his side.

Heero and Duo shared a look of foreboding.

Heero noted the three cameras that caught the entire area at different intervals. There was only a two second lapse over certain parts of the lobby. This place was far beyond any restaurant he could ever afford, even if he saved up for the rest of his natural life.

"Heero," Duo murmured in a low voice. Whispers would have spread through this room like wildfire. "Are you as dead uncomfortable as me?"

Heero nodded, his eyes scanning the Arabian doorway and the lushly carpeted room beyond it. He couldn't find one stain on that wide red carpet. It almost looked like flowing blood. Hell yes, he was uncomfortable.

"But you're gonna go through with this for Quatre, aren't you?"

Heero heard a touch of worry in Duo's voice and smiled down at him. "Of course." He couldn't think of one person who could resist Quatre's bubbly happiness.

Duo smiled tentatively at him. "Still..." And he looked around the room with wide eyes.

Heero couldn't agree more. Quatre had outdone anything they would have dreamed up. The tables were what looked to be actual wood, deep brown and polished to a glowing shine. The tablecloths were lace, the dishes china. People sipped champagne, napkins tucked into their shirt fronts. A woman in a sparkling red dress gently patted her lips with an edge of a napkin. The place was filled with murmurs, but everyone was quiet as a tomb.

Heero felt extremely out of his depth.

They were seated by a lady in a black skirt and waitress top. Quatre sat down automatically when a waiter came up and pulled out his chair, but Heero tensed when the man came behind him. Quatre hadn't even paused in his monologue about the restaurant and how it had once been a home. Heero couldn't even imagine that.

Duo looked like he was ready to jump out one of the large, overly fancy windows and run screaming down the streets. After stripping.

Menus were placed in front of them. Heero feared the things as soon as he noticed that he didn't recognize the language. It looked like a dead language – Spanish? French? Latin-based, he was sure.

"Uhmm, Quatre?" Duo, ever the socially braver of the two of them, interrupted Quatre's speech. "What is all this?"

Quatre seemed to notice the anxiety on their faces for the first time. He blushed, causing Trowa to chuckle slightly. "Oh. This restaurant attempts to keep everything... antique. The language is French."

"And just what the hell is it saying?" Duo asked. Heero laid a hand on his leg, trying to keep that edge of frustration from digging deeper into his tone. Duo took a deep breath.

Quatre blinked a few times at them. Heero sighed inwardly; Quatre had figured out how uncomfortable they were. Quatre smiled widely at them, his blush only a small thing. Apparently he didn't feel guilty about this at all.

Heero and Duo both watched in horror-filled trepidation as Quatre called over a waiter and spoke into his ear. They shared a look. Trowa chuckled again.

When their seats were pulled out for them, Heero tensed like a spring. Duo did a bit, as well, and seemed as confused as he. Were they leaving? They hadn't wanted to do that. Now their look was one of worry.

But instead of leaving, they were led into another part of the restaurant. This part was empty of other customers and even more eerily quiet. Heero looked around with a sense of trepidation. Quatre, on the other hand, beamed at them. "Now you don't have to worry about irritating those pompous rich people," he explained. "Be as rowdy and obnoxious as you like."

Heero could only stare at Quatre as he took his seat and the waiter left. Duo, however, had no problem snorting a laugh. "Gods, Quatre, you will never cease to shock the hell out of me."

Quatre preened at the compliment. "Thank you."

They actually managed to relax when Quatre informed them that prime ribs were available. Duo remarked that it was probably the most normal thing they had, and Trowa asked him why he thought squid was a strange meal. That got the two of them started. Heero smiled indulgently at Duo, glad to see him comfortable. And laughing.

Quatre, too, was beaming at Duo. Quatre looked at Heero and mouthed a few words. Heero felt his heart skip a few beats.

'I haven't heard him laugh in months.'

"Not only squid," Duo argued, "but slugs and octopus and... what was that other one again, Quatre?"

"Rib of pig?" Quatre asked.

Duo snorted. "No – goat stomach. That was it. Goat stomach. Why the hell would someone eat what another animal has already begun to digest – and the organ they digest it in?"

"Obviously that organ had to be healthy for the goat," Trowa pointed out, his face dead serious.

"That's... really fucking nasty."

Duo's eyes widened as he said that and took a sheepish look around the room. The man at the door acting as... door-watcher, Heero supposed, was trying ineffectively to hide a smile. Duo's smile was equally sheepish. "Oops."

The man just shook his head.

"Obviously someone disagrees," Trowa said blandly, pulling Duo out of his embarrassment by acting blithely, as if nothing had just occurred.

Duo sneered at him. "You mean those pompous idiots out there? They wouldn't know a good meal if it was smashed into their uppity little faces." Duo's face went all worried as he turned to Quatre this time. "Sorry, Qat."

Quatre got this look of fake affront on his face. "Are you calling me pompous?"

Duo mutely shook his head.

"Oh, I don't know," Trowa said, seeming to think about it. "You do think yourself better than them, love," he noted.

If Quatre had been a bird, he would have puffed his feathers in affront. "Of course," Quatre said smoothly. "Because I am."

Duo just snickered.

Heero only watched the three of them tease one another, coming to the conclusion that he simply didn't know how to converse. His smiles got a bit more awkward. Even now, when the war was over, he found himself the odd one out.

And just like during the war, it was Duo who turned to him, who seemed to instinctively know what he needed.

"Heero, do you know who that lady was in the painting out front?"

It was obvious prodding, since Duo was absolutely certain that it was the Virgin Mary, but Heero was grateful nonetheless. "If you say it's Mary, I agree with you. I don't know much about religion."

Duo gave him a look that told him he could've guessed that without Heero's input. Then smiled. "Then who would you guess?"

Heero blew out a breath. "Une on estrogen pills?"

Duo fell out of his chair in a fit of laughter.

"Heero!" Quatre admonished, but he was laughing, too. Trowa hid his smile behind his napkin. The door-watcher looked confused.

"Imagine Une with a baby!" Duo crowed, trying fruitlessly to right his chair.

The waiter came and took their orders then, quickly coming back with their drinks. The topic moved on to something a bit more mundane – their getting together.

So Heero told Quatre the same story he had before – that he had needed to see Duo. He felt the blush on his face and hoped it wasn't as huge as Duo's. It only got worse when they explained the talks they had – which Quatre made them repeat verbatim. They refused to speak about the times they spent in Duo's bed.

Quatre's questions were endless – were they staying together? How long? Had they _done it_ yet? That one made Duo and Heero bust into flame, which thrilled Quatre to no end. Trowa got his lover to stop with the interrogation once their meals arrived.

The meal went smoothly, the waiter making minimal appearances. Heero realized halfway through that Quatre sometimes sent warning glares outside the room they'd entered. Apparently Quatre didn't want anyone coming in and ruining the mood.

If Duo noticed, he didn't comment. But Heero thought he saw Duo's gaze flicker to the door a few times. Heero gently nudged him and was rewarded with another smile.

It was with regret and a promise to get in touch soon that they parted ways, waving cheerily and garnering contemptuous sniffs and glares from others who were leaving the restaurant. Duo was feeling ornery enough to flip one guy the bird. Quatre was still laughing about that when they pulled out of the driveway.

Once heading back to Duo's home, Duo began regaling on the room they'd been in – the tapestries that Quatre had explained, or tried to explain – most detailing famous battles or rulers or soldiers. Knights. Some man named Alexander the Great who apparently took over a large part of the left part of the main continent on Earth. The house, Quatre had told them, had been made in the early 1900's. AD. AD! Heero made a comment about barbarians living in that time, which got Duo into a heated argument over the term barbarians versus the term evolutionary ancestors.

Duo's cheeks were flushed from excitement and wine, his lips wide in a smile. His eyes were bright. Heero turned off the car after pulling into Duo's driveway and shut up Duo's rambling with a sound kiss.

Duo wasn't drunk, but he was excited and happy, which worked like alcohol in getting rid of his inhibitions. Heero knew that well enough, but he was still surprised when Duo leaned in, his lips hungry on Heero's.

The kiss became more than a quiet kiss of love. It was hot. It was fast. It was deep. But while it was fast... it lasted a long, long time.

They were both panting when they released each other. Duo beat Heero in taking off his seat belt – for once – and leaned in for another kiss. Heero growled, pulling Duo closer, meshing their groins together. Duo moaned into Heero's mouth.

Their clothes were evil restrictions that infuriated Heero. He couldn't feel Duo correctly beneath them, and it was tormenting him. Duo seemed to feel the same.

"Go get the door," Duo panted, and Heero understood that Duo needed a moment. He took the keys and gently nipped Duo's lip before getting out.

It was hell to move, difficult to concentrate. Heero had to focus to get the key in the stupid hole, which irritated him. His training flew out the window with Duo on his mind. He growled in triumph as he got the door open and immediately worked to throw off his jacket. He was unbuttoning the cuff links when Duo came in. Instincts went on alert when he caught Duo's stride out of his peripheral vision. His steps were aggressive, but not in passion.

Heero's eyes caught the anger in Duo's violet orbs a millisecond before he saw the journal in Duo's hand.

* * *

So much for abandoned? Though I'm not overly fond of this story, at least it's here. It has two more chapters, but I keep forgetting about this site and have only put them up on my website. Sorry?

Review, people! I hate admitting this, but I'll forget about this place again if I don't get reviews. Sorry?


	20. Uncertain Horizons

Gundam Wing is not mine. For those of you who don't know this, there are special places to help you out.

Footsteps

Chapter Twenty

Last Chance

* * *

Duo stood before him, the journal held out in front of him accusingly. Heero's heart plummeted. 

"This is the reason you came back, isn't it?" Duo demanded. His voice was hot, but it wavered just a bit at the end. Heero saw the tears in his eyes, the shine to them that were the only proof of his pain. His back was ramrod straight, his free hand clenched into a fist. He should look angry. Instead he looked... hopeless.

Heero couldn't argue. It was true enough. Heero never would have realized how wrong he was about Duo if not for that journal.

"I knew it," Duo said bitterly. "I knew it couldn't be true." He left the room and headed for the kitchen in angry jerks. Heero moved after him then, grabbing his arm and twisting him around.

"You're wrong." Duo's eyes were hard with something, some decision. Heero knew it wouldn't be good for him. "It _is_ true. Duo, I love you."

"Bullshit!" Duo screamed. He tore his arm free and stomped away.

"Duo!" Heero went after him again, but this time Duo avoided his hand. "Duo, please just _listen_..."

"_No_. I've listened enough." Duo moved to the trash can and ripped off the lid. It took Duo's opening the journal and grabbing a handful of papers before Heero understood what he was doing.

"No!" Heero grabbed Duo's wrists then, fighting to save that journal. "Duo, stop!"

"Let go of me!" Duo shoved him away, losing grip on the journal. Heero snatched it up before Duo could, holding it to his chest protectively. He knew he looked stupid, but he wasn't going to let that stop him from protecting that which had given him everything he'd ever wanted.

Duo glared at him even as a traitorous tear slid down his cheek. "Why?" he shouted. "Why did you do this? Was it _funny_? Let's all laugh at pathetic little Duo. He actually believes-"

"No! It isn't like that!" Heero shook his head vehemently. "I didn't know... I had no idea..."

"Well, you certainly know now." Duo snapped. He may have wanted to sound sarcastic, but his voice was only... sad. Incredibly sad. And bitter. "You know just how fucked up I am."

"No," Heero argued quietly. "I finally see... I see _you_. Duo..."

"Leave me alone!" Duo cried. "Go away – get out! Get out of my house! I don't ever want to see you again!"

Heero's heart tore at that, but he wouldn't leave. He had wounded Duo by not telling him this from the start. He wouldn't leave Duo with this new wound. It would be cruel, and he loved the man far too much.

Besides, if he left Duo like this, would Duo...?

He thought of the scars on Duo's wrists and new he wouldn't be leaving.

"Duo," he spoke softly, "please listen to me, even if you never want to hear me speak to you again. After I finish, I swear I will leave if that's what you still wish.

"Yes!" Duo snapped. "Get the fuck out!"

Heero let the pain slide through him, knowing that what Duo was feeling was much worse – the pain of betrayal. "During the war, I was attracted to you." He ignored Duo's look of disbelief. "I thought it senseless and based on nothing more than your physical appearance. I ignored it and tried to stay away from you whenever possible. When everything was over... I thought... I thought I would stop thinking about you. But I couldn't. And then... I found the journal. It... I had thought you were different... I had thought that you were ignorant and reckless. Shallow, with all of your laughter and jokes." Heero's shoulders slumped as he thought about that, about how very wrong he'd been.

Duo's eyes showed how much he was hurting, how much he'd been wounded. Even now, Heero knew, he was hurting Duo again. Duo had never been innocent, had never been shallow or reckless or stupid.

"You acted so well," Heero whispered. "And I fell for it. I believed it. But... when I read this – I didn't read all of it," he added quickly. "Just... enough. I had been wrong. So wrong. I... I didn't know... how very wrong I'd been. I... I had to see you again, to see if you were the same, if I could see the truth. And when I saw your face... when I finally saw you again, I..." He had to say this, even if he was thrown out right after. "I realized that I... I love you." He met Duo's eyes as he said that, trying to force Duo to see that truth, if nothing else. "The real you. The whole you. More than looks, far more than pity or... or some sick sense of maliciousness... I love you." Heero held the book tightly. "I never knew the truth... never accepted what a part of me already knew. This journal... finally made me see. Now... I can see through the mask. I can see you." Heero smiled slightly. "The real you."

Then he turned away and placed the journal down, fingering it lovingly before turning away. "That's the truth." He spread his hands wide, open. A vulnerable position. "I love you. The real you. The you who has scars branded on his soul, the you who cooks badly, the you who has a slobbering dog who wants to shove me off the bed, the you who writes poetry for a living, the you who can't sing."

Duo's face contorted with pain, the pain of feeling hope and believing it to be hopeless anyway. He was apparently silenced by his desire to not choke on his tears.

Duo," Heero said softly, "I can't take back what I've done – hiding this from you. I can't apologize enough for it. And I can't make you believe me. I can only explain this to you and hope you'll understand... that you'll give me another chance. I swear that this is the only secret I kept from you."

"But it's the one that matters most," Duo managed to whisper.

Heero closed his eyes for a second. "Yes. It is. If not for that journal, I may have been miserable forever, not knowing that what I felt for you was more than your looks. That somehow, a part of me had known. I would have continued to want you, and continued to deny myself. And in doing so... without knowing it... I may have lost you." Heero shivered a bit at the thought. "I did almost lose you," he whispered.

"No," Duo said then, his voice gaining strength. "You never would have lost me – because you never _had_ me." Duo's eyes burned with tears and fury. Heero already saw Duo's decision in his eyes. "I listened. Now it's time for you to leave."

Frustration snapped through Heero's veins enough for him to grab Duo's wrists. He only held on tighter when Duo fought against him. "Duo, promise me something."

"You don't deserve any promises," Duo snapped.

"Maybe not," Heero said, "but you're going to promise me this anyway." Heero shook Duo slightly to emphasize his point. "Dammit, Duo, promise me you won't hurt yourself."

"What?" The shock in Duo's eyes didn't completely hide the emotions beneath it – the emotions that clearly said he planned on doing just that.

"Promise me, Duo," Heero pleaded. "I can't stand the thought of losing you... of you dying because of me."

It was proof of how emotionally drained Duo was that he didn't deny it. "Then you should have thought of that before you did this!"

"Dammit, Duo!" Heero yelled, finally losing a bit of that patience that usually held him through even the worst situations. "Don't do this to me! How would you feel if I left today and offed myself?!"

Duo froze at the thought, his breath catching. "You wouldn't..." he hesitated. He voice sounded broken then, unchecked as he tried to deny what Heero said.

"No," Heero reassured, "I won't. But... losing you..." Heero found his throat locking up and fought to get the words out, "I can't bear the idea... it will be a thousand times worse than after the war. A million. Now... now, more than ever, I know what I'm losing." And the thought made him want to scream. He hadn't cried in years... but he thought he just might soon. "I don't want to lose you," Heero murmured.

"Shut up," Duo whispered, then closed his eyes and tried again. "Shut the hell up!"

"I'm sorry," Heero whispered, then fell silent. Now it was all up to Duo. He could do no more.

"No," Duo murmured, shaking his head violently. "You're lying – you can't...!"

"I'm not lying."

"You are!" Duo argued. "You can't be telling me the truth – it can't be... I'm a joke. I'm a joke-"

"No," Heero said harshly. "Curse me if you want... scream... but don't degrade yourself. It's my fault for not telling you... for hiding it from you. Blame me. Duo... blame me... but please don't blame yourself."

"I should never have started that goddamn journal!" Duo snarled then.

Heero wanted to scream. "No, Duo. That journal was my salvation. Please..."

"Dammit," Duo howled, "why do I love you?!"

Heero's heart clenched. "I don't know." He moved toward Duo, his steps slow and silent, though he knew Duo knew he was coming closer. "I don't deserve it."

"No, you don't," Duo agreed, but Heero heard the self-degradation in the words and knew Duo was talking more of himself not deserving anything.

Heero slowly wrapped his arms around Duo and sighed. Here was the truth, more than words, more than promises. Here was his heart. "I love you," Heero said simply. Duo was tense beneath his fingers, as stiff as a block. He didn't move to take Heero in his arms, but he also didn't fight back.

They stayed like that for who knew how long, Heero just holding onto Duo and slowly, slowly feeling Duo relax in his arms. It probably took about ten minutes for Duo to relax enough as to not be a block of wood or a cement block, then another five for Duo to ever-cautiously raise his arms and entwine them slowly, so slowly around Heero's neck. It was only another minute until Duo had his face buried in Heero's chest and was trembling with the effort not to cry.

"I'm sorry," Heero whispered then. "I'm sorry I lied to you... I'm sorry I did this to you."

"Bastard," Duo sniffled, his voice quavering and lacking malice.

"I know," Heero murmured. "I know."

"Asshole," he continued for good measure.

Heero could only smile, hearing the reluctance and... resignation in Duo's voice. "One more try?"

"I can't," Duo said, his voice so... hopeless. "I can't do it again. I can't."

"Yes, you can," Heero assured. "Because I'll be right here with you. Right beside you."

Duo shook his head. "For how long? That journal only-"

"Never doubt my love for you," Heero said fiercely. "Never doubt that I love you with everything I am. The journal showed me the truth. The journal led me back to you. The journal did not force me here. I didn't come to you to give you pity or to play a prank. I _love_ you. Don't ever fucking question that."

Duo said nothing... but his hug increased in ferocity. Heero tightened his own hold and closed his eyes. "Please, Duo... don't take this away from us."

Duo shivered. "I'm scared."

"So am I." Heero's grip tightened a bit further. "But... I'm more afraid of losing this."

Duo was silent, even as he fought those tears. "So am I," Duo whispered. Heero stilled; the voice was wavering and sad... Duo wasn't _fighting_ tears... he was crying.

Heero gently took Duo to the floor and held him close. He rocked Duo back and forth, trying to comfort even while he felt his own emotions warring within him. He couldn't ignore the fact that it was him who made Duo cry. His fault. He couldn't apologize enough. But he wouldn't leave Duo, no matter what. Was that selfish? Maybe love was selfish, at least a little bit. But staying felt right. And hadn't he promised to follow his emotions? Everything inside him screamed for Duo.

For now... for now... this was enough.

* * *

A/N: Epilogue? Yes or no? 

Don't forget to review, or else I'll forget about this place. I'm really sorry about constantly forgetting... thank you so much to those who reviewed...


	21. Epilogue: Together With the Dawn

Gundam Wing is not mine. For those of you who don't know this, there are special places to help you.

Footsteps

Epilogue

* * *

It had been a week since they'd had the all-out spitting match over the journal. It was now safely in the top drawer beside their bed. Heero never touched it, but Duo began telling him more about his past. Heero began doing the same.

A perfect ending? With these two? Ah-ha-ha. No.

Heero had to get a job, and was close to the Preventors headquarters. Coincidence or fate, he decided to try the place out. Duo worried like a mother-hen, but let it slide.

There were still tense moments. Moments where Heero plainly saw Duo staring at him as if he would up and run off, leaving him all alone again. Moments when no matter what Heero did, Duo did not believe.

But those times became less and farther between with every time Heero went over and confronted those looks. Those were times when words were impediments. Lust was nonexistent. Heero merely held Duo until he relaxed. Only then would the talking begin.

Quatre, of course, dragged Trowa in for them to meet almost every bloody day. Heero met Wufei in the Preventors and dragged him over every once in a while.

Perfect? No. But a thousand times better.

"Duo, we're gonna be late," Heero called to the bedroom as he straightened his tie. They were going out, once again in the past week, this time chosen by none other than Quatre. Apparently he'd made a reservation for the entire room even though there would be only the five of them. Heero couldn't wait to see Wufei in a suit. _He'll be uncomfortable as hell,_ Heero thought.

Duo came out of the bedroom growling at his own tie, a jumbled mass around his neck. Heero choked trying to hide his laughter. Duo shot him an irritated glare. "This is a pain in the ass," Duo complained.

"True," Heero chuckled. "Just think of the food."

Duo stopped then. "Yep, you're right. It's almost worth it."

Heero had to bite his lip this time to keep from laughing. "Come here and let me help." He straightened Duo's tie and they headed for the door.

"Wait – one second." And Duo raced back into the bedroom.

Heero sighed, but waited patiently. Duo was as adamant as he about being punctual. It had to be something important.

Duo came out bearing gifts Heero had never seen before, struggling under their weight. "Duo, what the hell?" Heero immediately came over to help.

"I have something to tell everyone when we get to the restaurant," he grunted, giving Heero a grateful smile when half the packages were transferred to other arms.

"Oh?" He opened the door for Duo, gaining a grateful grunt and a "I could've gotten it" from his lover.

"Of course," he assured, and smiled when Duo harrumphed.

* * *

They arrived at the restaurant late, of course, and were greeted in the room by their friends. Heero stuck close to Duo, knowing how emotional his lover sometimes got. Having their friends greet them was something they never thought they would see.

Everyone quickly got up to help them with their load, exclaiming over the gifts.

"Duo! Heero! What's all this for?!" Quatre cried, moving to Duo's side while Trowa helped Heero.

"Hell if I know," Heero replied, shooting a thankful grin to Trowa. Whatever Duo had bought, he hadn't thought of overall weight.

"Maxwell!" Wufei cried in indignation. "How can you get us all gifts and not tell us!" Heero knew Wufei meant that it was somehow unjust for a friend to give a gift and get nothing in return.

Duo looked down quickly, though, and Heero knew just as immediately that Duo thought he had done something terribly wrong. Heero went to him and touched his arm. "It is, apparently, for some sort of surprise that Duo will spring on us."

Wufei growled. "If he has good news, shouldn't _we_ be giving _him_ presents?" But Wufei looked curiously at the boxes in front of him.

Duo mumbled something unintelligible, and Trowa intervened by asking Heero about his first case as Preventor.

"Damn red tape," Heero immediately muttered, making Wufei laugh. They talked about the case as much as they could, and everyone started joking about how doing the same things were a helluva lot easier during a war. Duo relaxed enough to enter the conversation.

"So," Trowa said finally, looking up from the food delivered to them to stare at Duo, "will we find out why we have mountains of presents piled around our table or are we supposed to guess?"

Duo blushed. "Well, I..." He looked up and smiled slightly when he saw Heero's reassuring look. "My..." He flicked his eyes to Wufei, "my poetry is being published in a book... it'll be sent out even to the colonies."

Cheers went up from Quatre's side of the table, making one of his bodyguards outside jump and look inside. Trowa immediately sent up congratulations while Wufei looked at Duo in surprise, not knowing that Duo was a poet. Then he congratulated Duo, as well.

Duo was looking down and blushing, flicking his eyes to Heero. He seemed to freeze a bit when Heero stood.

Heero got Duo out of his chair and out of the room, waving exaggeratedly at the guys. Quatre and Trowa both snickered, but Wufei was frowning at him.

"Heero...?" Duo questioned, looking at Heero quizzically... hurtfully.

"I love you," he said simply, moving Duo into the bathroom and then scooping him up off his feet and twirling him around. "I love you," he repeated before bringing Duo down for a resounding kiss.

Duo twined his arms around Heero's neck and laughed, his beautiful violet eyes sparkling. "I love you, too."

Their lips met again, a harmony in their movements. Heero's heart lifted.

Perfect? Perhaps... yes.

* * *

End. Hope you liked.

P.S. - What was in the presents, you ask? How the hell should I know?


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